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Derek, if you hack me, I’m calling your mom.
Hey, Mrs. Peterson.
Gosh, how have you been?
It’s been a while.
Wow.
You sound great.
Hey, I’m Grump.
I’m not so Grump.
And we’re the Game Grumps.
Oh, here we are.
Oh, my God.
Yes.
How can it be true?
I don’t know how it could be true, you know?
I didn’t realize that.
I don’t know how it could be true, you know?
I didn’t realize that Horse Club Adventures…
Adventures of Jellybongus and Jellybongus.
…was such a huge hit outside of our very niche audience.
I didn’t realize this was, like, a loved game.
I’m legit thrilled.
I’m legit thrilled that we will get to experience
Hazelwood Stories.
Seriously.
What?
It’s great.
It’s just great.
It’s great that we have one.
Oh, I can use a controller, right?
Yeah, of course.
Yeah.
Okay, language.
It’s so magical.
I wonder if it’s going to have the same narrator.
It’s got the same music.
Yes, it sure does.
Wow, where are we now?
What a delightful villa.
I want to be here.
Yeah, this place looks amazing.
How about Profile 1?
This makes me not want to be in L.A. so bad.
I mean, fucking, I’ll just middle it out.
What’s my name?
Men.
Belly-Jingus?
Belly-Jingus.
Wow, look at that. Great name.
Ooh.
Nice coat.
I want spots.
Wow, that’s nice.
Enter your horse’s name.
Belly-Jongus.
Belly-Jongus.
Oh, easy.
Belly-Jongus.
There we go.
Welcome to Horse Club Adventures 2, Hazelwood Stories.
No.
It’s not the same girl.
It’s autumn at Lakeside now.
It’s my favorite season.
Damn it, she sounds like she’s from, like, Ohio.
Hazelwood glaze in the colors of autumn and then leaves Russell under a horse’s hooves.
Calling out on rides is just awesome.
It’s like holding back tears.
We’re so happy to be here.
Shit, I promised I wasn’t going to do this.
The horse club includes Lisa with Storm, Sophia with Blossom, Sarah with Mystery.
And Jennifer with Herpes.
We’ll explore Hazelwood together and have adventures with our horses.
With our horses.
Why?
Why did he leave right before I was going on vacation?
It’s like he did it on purpose.
Lakeside at last.
I’ve been looking forward so much to being here again and to seeing all our friends.
Oh, good.
Sarah and Sophia are already waiting for us with their horses.
Kayen, Storm, Mystery, and Blossom.
There’s definitely some kind of accent going on.
Yeah, they’re already waiting for us being with their horses.
Wow, it’s the same fucking location.
They bought drone technology.
We’re on the beach?
Like the last one?
It’s the same town.
Is it?
Feels a little different.
I mean, the visuals.
Did I shit my pants?
I don’t know.
What the?
Alright.
I mean, accident.
This is not the same run cycle.
No, this is very different.
Wow.
It’s like Ninja Warriors.
I have to greet the girls.
Is there like a ninja run button?
Yeah, here we go.
Horse Club Adventures 2.
Now all pants come pre-shitted.
Look, all my friends have shitted and farted their pants.
Sophia, Lisa, Hannah, Sarah said welcome to Lakeside.
Wow, their mouths move now.
Look at these huge advancements in horse club technology.
I don’t think they were voice acted in the last game.
No, that was us doing it.
Yeah.
Take it easy.
Take me to dinner first.
Come on.
Get on top.
Jelly bangers.
Wow.
Oh, she doesn’t move her mouth.
It’s a blood oath.
Take the dagger.
We need your hand.
Hold out your hand.
Uh, thanks.
Where do I go now?
Go to the mirror.
Oh my god, I shit myself.
How did no one see that during the entire making process of this game?
Belly jingus and belly jongus.
Oh, I already fucking did all this.
That doesn’t look anything like you in the icon.
Well, I think it’s just default art.
Oh, I see.
Ooh, cute little vest.
I love the vest.
Dude, I know.
Still, one of my all time favorite things you’ve ever said was,
oh my god, look at all these cute little riding shirts.
This just came from such an honest place.
All right.
I can’t even see my ears.
Yeah.
Dude, I’m so happy with this outfit.
Damn, I’m adorable.
Yo, my horse, I don’t give a fuck.
Your horse is wearing 80s leg warmers.
Yo, look at that.
Damn.
I could do the Jane Fonda workout.
It’s a little fucking, uh, she’s a maniac, maniac in the stable.
Your floor, yeah, your floor.
Your horse has that, like, side swinging hairstyle.
It’s so dead ass.
I guess.
All right, Hannah, let’s get to the horses.
Shit, shit, wait for me.
Shit, shit.
Guys, guys.
Wait for me.
Shit.
Whoops.
Oh, shit.
I have so many things to try on my outside mirror.
Oh, wait, is the dog still weird?
A little bit.
Oh, it does things now.
It doesn’t just have a blank stare with one foot in the water dish.
They’re like, hurry the fuck up, belly joggers.
Yeah.
Belly jingas.
Once you’re sitting on your horse, you can walk, jump, and sprint, just the same as on
foot.
Oh, okay.
I see.
It’s called a canter, a trot, and a gallop.
We always ride as a group, so it’s best if you see to it that you stay with us.
She’s the base.
Oh, my god, yeah.
In the barbershop quartet.
We always ride as a group.
Hell, yeah.
Let’s ride.
Girls, let’s go.
I love it.
We are so dead ass.
Wait, is dead ass a noun or an adjective?
It’s both.
Really?
Sure.
Okay.
No, it’s sure.
I guess if you had an ass that was dead.
Yeah, that’s a dead ass.
Oh, there’s cars now.
Oh, my god.
That’s terrifying.
Yeah.
The progress has been made.
That’s not an upgrade.
I don’t like that at all.
Yay, they’re still getting muffins.
We could get hit by a car afterwards.
Faster.
No, I’m just going to stop in the road.
I’m going to stop in the road.
Today, we want to take you on a real tour around Hazelwood.
Come on.
Are there really no more cars coming?
They just wanted that for the aesthetic.
That’s pretty great.
Oh, well.
You’ll see.
All right, let’s fucking go, girls.
Yeah.
Let’s fucking trot.
Thus, they began their quest to throw the one ring into the fires of Mount Doom.
Hey, belly jingus.
Let’s get a ride from our friends, the eagles.
You got that ring in your mouth?
I swallowed it.
Oh, no.
Belly jongus.
It’s a hungry, hungry horse.
Does everybody still have shit on their jeans?
Check.
The shit check.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Remember the night people or whatever they were?
The shadow people?
What?
I don’t remember that.
In the previous game, when they hadn’t revealed the character yet, you just saw the dark outline.
And you were like, we’re all having fun on our horses.
Whee.
Whee.
I’m about to run my friends off the road, dude.
Hey, what the fuck?
Jelly bingus.
You’ll fucking pay for this, belly jingus.
I gotta get used to that belly jingus.
This is the story of Hazelwood, dog.
You better raise your game.
I know.
Look at this little village.
I love these games so much, dude.
Village.
Hurry the fuck up.
Faster.
Faster.
Go, go, go.
Hurry the fuck up.
How come we’re not talking anymore?
I thought we were supposed to have a little chat.
Did I say something weird?
Yeah, things got catty.
Yeah.
This is like a real awkward, quiet trot.
The two are like whispering up there.
She, I don’t, she shouldn’t be allowed in Hazelwood.
I don’t, I don’t think she.
Let’s take a look at Hazelwood.
We did everything for her.
Gang violence capital of the world.
It’s very walkable.
Yeah, I don’t think you have much choice.
Do, do, do.
I had a soccer field.
Thanks, Sarah.
How come you already see it on the sign here?
They’re definitely being catty.
This is Hazelwood.
Yeah, we know.
We know.
From here, we’ll ride once around Hazelwood and show you everything.
Okay.
Cool.
I like Lisa.
I know you do, Arin.
Lisa’s my favorite.
I know.
She’s got a, she’s got a commanding presence.
We’re going to ride around here and hang us.
There’ll be more Indiana Jones.
We walk from here.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Sorry.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Traditionally in battle, people on foot were at a tremendous disadvantage.
You like pull out a mace and just ride them down.
Not the South Koreans.
They created an entire martial art to fight against horses.
Anyway, bye.
Which was that Taekwondo?
Yeah.
Yeah.
All those jumpy kicks.
All those jump kicks.
Can’t can’t fucking stay on a horse when you’re getting kicked in the face.
The real party is at the hot new church downtown.
This is the old stinky church.
We don’t like that.
Megan works there.
Okay, let’s do that.
Nobody else is following.
What the fuck?
That’s okay.
We’re going to stay here.
I’m going to spray paint Episcopalian’s rule Baptist’s drool.
Wow.
What a view.
Let’s go.
Oh, let’s go.
Damn.
What the fuck?
This place is huge.
Just playing Baptist’s.
Got nothing but love for you.
Do you remember all the towns in the first game were just like shacks?
Yeah.
This shit’s like a whole town.
Yes.
Why don’t you get a closer look?
Oh my God.
A real closer look.
Why don’t you get real close to the fence there?
Real close.
Pushing distance.
Oh my God, they’re so mean to each other.
Yeah.
Are you done?
Let’s fucking go.
Let’s go.
We still haven’t visited dead girl cliff.
Where are we going?
Okay.
Is that a raccoon?
What was that to the side?
I don’t know.
Oh yeah.
What the fuck?
What is it?
A lemur.
Wow.
Yeah, it is a raccoon.
Okay.
Very cute.
Okay.
Hurry up.
Geez.
Go.
They’re like, you’ll love the park.
And I’m like, I loved where we were, but we left so quickly.
Do you like the view?
Gotta go.
I’ll show you the view.
Great view, isn’t it?
Let’s go somewhere else.
Oops.
Sorry.
Sorry, horse.
I wish I could just run.
You know, just let me run.
Can I get carrots to give the horse?
Oh, I give the horse a little pet.
You can pet the horse in this game.
That’s nice.
Look at this.
Look at all these buildings and shit.
Dude, are you trying to box her out?
A little bit.
I don’t know.
I’m just trying to make it interesting.
Can we ask the jazz band to turn it down a little bit?
Nope.
Cal Chater on the vibraphone.
Uh-oh.
Did we freeze?
Are we frozen?
No.
E.
Okay.
What the fuck happened?
Did I just lose my controller?
Wow, Arin.
Let’s try again.
These girls were already impatient.
There we go.
All right.
Where’s your controller from?
All right.
Go.
Where the fuck are we going?
Girls, girls, make up your minds.
Are we getting muffins or what?
There’s really no reason for them to have the limit on how you can…
Wow, that car.
Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me.
Sorry.
This bridge is already very old.
We’d be better off riding across it only one at a time.
Okay.
Try not to get hit by a tiny car.
One, two, three, four.
Where’s the fifth?
It’s me.
I am the fifth.
Why would I want to ride slower?
It’s like hot tip, ride slower with left trigger.
The consequences, if you don’t, will be very significant.
But no doubt, it’s a different case with five horses.
Okay.
That is such a weird thing to say.
I know.
And way to say it.
Yeah.
And on we go.
With me, the bridge didn’t even wobble.
But with someone else, I won’t name names.
Perhaps they’ve been enjoying too many muffins down at the smoothie shop?
Sometimes we’re even allowed to ride on the soccer field.
Lisa, you’re great.
Let’s go ride on the soccer field, Lisa.
Please pull it together.
Okay.
Park our horses?
Is that what you say?
Maybe she meant parkour horses and they’re going to do flips.
We can parkour horses over there?
Let’s go to the rooftops, ladies.
But we just did.
Do I look like I give a fuck?
Yes, Lisa.
That’s what I was just explaining.
Take it easy.
Let’s just make sure you don’t set off.
Now we’re coming to the village center of Hazelwood.
Yay.
You look a little, oh, okay.
Floating away, eh?
Oh God, it’s the shit girls.
Hey, please don’t come in the shop.
Told you a thousand times, you got to wash before you get in here.
Please use the drive-through.
Oh my God.
Unlike Sophia.
Cool.
Are we supposed to rearrange these words so they make a sentence?
Except that in the fall, of course, no one goes in the water anymore now.
What?
I love it.
It feels like it was written by the same people from Sealand or, you know, whatever fine country they’re from.
But it was then, the scripts were then given to localized people like from America to read, but they didn’t change the lines at all.
I guess I’ll read it as written.
I mean, I just love it.
It’s so great.
Oh, motherfucker, this fucking wire just like keeps like going out.
I’m sure it does, except that in the fall, of course.
I was like, literally like I was trying to solve a puzzle.
It’s like, there’s got to be a way to say this without not making it make sense.
Okay.
There’s news hanging on the bulletin board. Let’s take a look right away what it says.
Sounds like an idea, great.
Let’s take a look right away what it says.
Everything makes sense when you read it in that voice.
Yeah, of course.
News on the bulletin board.
Contest of photography.
Hey, let me see too.
You’re about to step on my feet.
Come on.
Boo, off.
Wow, a photo contest?
And the best photo series will be shown in Hazelwood?
I like that she’s got like the pinky out of the pocket.
That’s always a cool move.
Like the, you know what I mean?
I have never done that in my life.
I’ve never done it either.
But like, that is really strange.
I’m going to start.
It’s like you’re trying to itch a little bit like you’re like, okay, so.
Hello.
Oh, I remember this guy.
Are you going to compete in it too?
No, the newspaper I work for is hosting it and I’ll be helping to choose the best photo series.
So, do you want to be a part of it?
I feel like we’ve heard this guy’s voice before.
Does it not sound familiar?
The voice actor?
I need to hear again.
Oh my God.
They think as one.
They speak as one.
They are the Borg.
As written probably seems less weird than when you actually just do it like that.
Yeah.
Yeah, sure.
Like, oh my God.
I love, oh man.
Belly jingus.
That’s a great background?
What?
Shit a nice photo?
To do this, go to the green photo dot and press the button which is shown to you.
Okay.
Cheese.
I’m sorry, is this fucking photography human club adventures?
No.
On an outing to Hazelwood.
Got it.
Everyone looks so natural.
You can view the photo right away in the album.
I know you don’t want to miss a second of it.
All right, I got to turn this fucking music down because this shit’s like so overwhelming.
Bring that to a four.
All right.
Okay, so what now?
Look at the photo in the, oh God.
Open up the pause menu and then look at the photo.
Wow.
What a sizzler.
I looked at before.
Wow.
I like the photo.
Great.
I wonder if there’s some service we can do, use to upload it onto our phones where people
can say horrible things about us.
That sounds healthy.
But first of all, we need to do a theme for our photo series before we start taking photos.
No, that’s not, that was not as written.
She said it a different way.
I noticed that.
But first of all, we do need a theme for our photo series before we start taking photos.
Maybe with a muffin we should.
What?
Um.
Chalk it over at cups and zest.
That is so disturbing.
The hive mind.
Sophia Lisa Sarah agrees.
Then have lots of fun photographing and see you soon.
Don’t forget to bring me your photos on time.
Who does he sound like?
I know that voice.
I have no idea.
Is it from a video game?
I’m losing my mind over here.
Are you losing your sight?
Hey, they’re speaking to you.
Oh, I hope not.
It’s like what I’d hear in my dreams.
Thanks, Daniel.
Hey, Daniel.
Go to the bridge.
Don’t you miss Storm when you’re not with him?
Who?
I love the X-Men.
Oh, Storm the horse.
Yeah.
Got it.
Yeah.
This is my horse.
Sure thing.
I miss him.
I miss the horse.
It’s a short thing.
Missing horse.
There’s a shortcut to the cafe through here.
Oh, yay.
The cafe.
Ride our horses.
Oh, is it going to be my favorite?
I hope so.
It’s the event arena, by the way.
Festivals or traveling carnivals are held here in the summer.
Can we?
Please.
My horse.
It’s so impatient.
But when the plaza’s not being used at the moment, we’re allowed to ride on it too.
Okay.
It’s also where the sacrifices take place, so we’ll have a good harvest.
Belly Genghis, would you like to take three guesses who’s getting sacrificed?
Let’s go to the cafe to fatten one of us up.
Yeah.
It’s not anyone from the hive mind, that’s for sure.
And a delicious smoothie.
Yeah.
Let’s get a delicious smoothie.
Sponsored by Jamba Juice.
That would be so funny.
Like if there’s one really obvious plant.
Like, let’s all go to Shake Shack.
Yeah.
God, I used to like smoothies and muffins, but as soon as these Shake Shack burgers with
their Shake Shack shakes came to town, there was no turning back for me.
Yes.
And they all like speak at the same time.
Shake Shack TM is great.
Oh, God.
It’s so weird when they’re synchronized like that.
Yeah.
It’s the Cups and Saddles Cafe.
My two favorite things to eat food out of.
And I’m not talking about drinking cups.
Dismount.
The best muffins.
Nice parking job.
Oh my God.
We’re talking about part Tom, there’s Tom.
Nice that you’re here too.
Hey, Sarah, you back here again for our muffins?
It’s all we do here at Shake Shack.
TM.
The newspaper on Hazelwood is having a photo contest and the best photo series will be
shown on the main square.
Okay.
Wow.
Thanks for that exposition.
And it’s a sure thing you’re competing.
Sure thing.
Yeah.
Same writers.
This is a horse club adventure game.
We wanted to talk it over here.
It’s a lot better with a muffin in your hand.
Is that a euphemism or?
Well, then I don’t want to disturb you.
Here are your muffins and smoothies.
Cool.
Awesome.
Looking forward to diarrhea.
Muffins and smoothies.
Are you kidding?
I would not want to be shaking around on a horse after that.
Who wants to do their insulin shot first?
Life with horses.
Adventure in the saddle.
Adventure in the saddle?
Is that what you said?
Riders ready.
Horses steady.
Go.
I don’t like that one, Lisa.
I think all the ideas are great.
What do you think?
Oh, God.
I have to play favorites now?
I’d go for option four.
Sacrificing the virgin.
Adventures in the saddle sounds the most.
Adventures in the saddle.
Life with riders.
Life rider.
Life ride.
Ride.
Ride.
Ride horses.
Okay.
I’m scared.
I feel like I’m being asked to join a cult every time they get together like that.
Let’s take a photo of cups and saddles right away.
Because it’s the perfect place to meet for us and our horses.
Because it’s a perfect place to meet for us and our horses.
Lisa, you need to go on script.
Welcome to Hazelwood where we dangle all of our participles.
Wait, hold on.
I think I got to change this.
This is so annoying.
Okay.
And there we go.
All right.
Let’s take a picture, shall we?
Dangling participles.
Shoot photo.
Oh, it’s my girlfriend.
She still works here.
The first photo in our own photo series.
Yep.
Titled Creeper.
I just know it’ll be great.
Will we take the next photos first thing tomorrow?
Sure thing.
I thought that maybe we could practice some dressage.
Oh, hell yeah.
That fits in wonderfully with our series.
Sure.
Did her voice raise?
I thought it was lower than that.
Well, whatever.
Just as the deepest of them.
Oh, okay.
First thing tomorrow at Lakeside.
Say, then let’s ride a race to Lakeside.
Did you know that you can-
Why did you move the mouth now but not then?
You can take a look there to see how you can ride to Lakeside.
Did you know that you can always look at the map?
For instance, you can take a look there now to see how you can ride to Lakeside.
Got it.
You’ll find the map in the menu.
Go take a look at it before we ride away.
Now I’m communicating via telepathy.
I gotta talk to my wife.
Where?
Oh, come on.
Oh, they won’t let you.
What the fuck?
Maybe you can talk to Tom and that’ll unlock.
I can’t even talk to fucking Tom.
Not that I wanted to.
My life is a disaster.
Your life, your life, your life is a disaster, disaster, disaster.
Wow, that looks like some kind of cereal.
Whoa, dude.
No, you know what it looks like?
What?
You know when you pour out the freeze-dried cup of noodles and it’s got like the pieces of corn, carrot, and peas?
The corn, peas, and carrot, yeah.
That’s totally it.
That’s exactly what it looks like.
All right, what am I doing here with the map?
I don’t know, man.
A gorgeous first day.
They wanted you to go somewhere.
They want to race.
Oh, shit.
Oh, right, yes.
If you lose, you’re the one who gets sacrificed.
Ooh, are you going to have to do horsey leaps?
Oh, I’m going to have to do some fucking horsey leaps, dude.
This is big.
All right.
All right, we get it.
Jesus.
God, this is like Mario-
Oh, I can hold it.
It’s like Mario Golf when they show you the entire like 18 holes.
Tool, when, go.
I just cut her off, man.
Get out.
Dude, I’m fucking wrecking shit right now.
Quickly.
Quickly, Belly Jungus, leave a trail of road apples to block her path.
For her to slip on.
She will get injured.
Watch out for the fox.
It loves eating horses.
Go.
Hold on.
I’m going to pet my horse real quick.
Now go.
Don’t fail me now.
Ride you mongrel.
Oh my God.
I’m not even halfway done.
That’s okay.
You’re doing well.
Hey.
Watch for the road.
Okay, there it is.
Just make sure the road isn’t going to hit us.
Arin, you’re crushing this.
Yeah, I don’t know where she is right now.
Oh, she’s right on your tail.
Oh my God, never look back.
Bunnies.
Bunnies.
Watch out.
Oh my God.
Wow.
All right, well, they reproduce quickly.
Yeah, they sure do.
Well, not when the mom’s gone.
Oh, Arin, you had to make it so real.
Hey.
Almost, almost.
Get there, get there, get there.
Gold medal.
Yeah, baby.
How do you like that shit?
Hannah’s home run.
You’ll have won three medals.
Hannah gets off her horse, she’s like, fucking, fine.
Hey girl, who is this now?
That’s Mrs. Kramer, the other one you love.
Welcome to Lakeside.
Didn’t he turn the fucking music down?
Why are they so quiet?
It’s his turn down.
We were in Hazelwood, it was great.
The newspaper is having a photo contest, and we signed up too.
Did you?
Boy, I wonder if the photo winner of the photo contest has their shit displayed in the town’s
choir.
All together, no doubt you’ll manage to take love.
I can’t hear Mrs. Kramer.
No doubt you’ll take good photos, sure thing.
But for today, our horses are allowed to take it easy.
I’ll go take care of Cayenne right away.
The pepper?
After a long day, your horse is surely-
Yes, leave me alone with Mrs. Kramer.
Hi.
Love apples?
Go get some from the apple tree over there, and feed your horse with them.
Okay.
Whatever you say, Mrs. Kramer.
I’ll do it, I’ll do it.
I’ll do it, it’s good, it’s fine.
Oh, those apples?
That is a very unusually shaded apple tree.
Yeah, I didn’t know apple trees could turn purple.
I don’t know if they can.
I’m gonna go ahead and turn the voices up.
There you go.
Turn the music to one.
No, Arin, no.
I need it at a three.
It adds so much.
You can still hear it, deuce.
Yeah, you can.
I’m turning it down because it’s fucking loud.
Come on.
Give me the apples.
Oh, they’re all eating the ground.
Gather apples, Arin.
Gather ten apples.
Ew.
Just picking them up off the ground?
You don’t know how long they’ve been there.
They’re good enough for Mrs. Kramer.
I don’t know if I’m into Mrs. Kramer anymore.
Sorry, Mrs. Kramer.
You eat weird apples, and that’s a deal breaker for me.
She’s like, I’m married.
Clearly, I’m married.
Yuck.
You blew it, Mrs. Kramer.
A gorgeous first day.
Wait.
Oh, I gotta feed the apples to jelly, jelly bomb.
Bali, bali, belly jongas.
I’m so sorry.
Crunch, crunch, crunch.
Munch, munch, munch.
You and your horse are even better friends now.
Your horse can now sprint more often.
Because we’re friends?
Okay.
Your horse thought you were a festering piece of shit before.
But as it turns out, you’re okay.
So is my horse not like…
My horse is just like not cooperating?
Is that what the narrative is here?
Your horse has moved down one notch on your list of friends in order of likeliness.
How are they to betray you?
Couldn’t even get that sentence out.
I know, it’s affecting me.
Feed the apples you find by the trees to your horse.
Then the trust between you will grow, which means you’ll be able to work together better.
That is such a fucking roundabout way to say that sentence.
The trust between you will grow like an apple out of the ground.
You can feed the apples you find by the trees to your horse.
You can feed…
I guess that would be the way to write it.
She just said it so like, you can feed the apples you find by the trees.
You can feed your horse with the apples you find by the tree.
Yes.
That would be it.
Apple trees grow everywhere around here.
You’ll find them simply by exploring this world.
They’re bright fuchsia.
Use the apple radar to find the apples.
It will beep loudly and obnoxiously when you’re close to apples.
You can still do small chore quests at Lakeside.
Side quests have nothing to do…
Oh, I’m glad they’re called chore quests.
Yeah, makes it sound fun.
Really exciting.
There’s always something to do here.
Like chores.
…where you’ll find everything to tend your horse.
This is my first side quest for you.
Okay.
People don’t talk like that.
Troll that lives beneath the bridge.
Yeah.
Look in your diary in the menu…
Bring me back three dragon horns.
…so that it’s shown to you.
Scalp the goblin king.
Belly jongus will help you along that path.
Whoa, I just got stuck.
For a second.
Whoa, hello butterfly.
Wow.
Are you trapped in there?
Yeah.
Thank God.
Wanted me to jump over it.
Oh, I have to open the side quest.
Uh, a gorgeous day.
First day.
Ten to…
Oh, side quests.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, shit.
Alright, we gotta run.
But next time on Game Grumps.
Oh, shit.
Okay.
You can find your way around well.
Well, around well.
Well, what?
Where’s the well?
So you can find your way around well.
That one.
It’s a circle, so it won’t be hard.
You can find your way around well.
That’s the end of this sentence.
I freaking love that they made a second one of these.
Oh, yeah, dude.
How glorious.
It’s the fucking exact same.
Like, it’s just the graphics.
It’s the same.
The same people.
It’s just wonderful.
I do love the downtown area, though.
That’s really, really pleasant.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, that’s progress for you.
Mm-hmm.
Alright, we’ll see you later, everyone.
Bye.
Lots of love.
Jellybuyingus.
Jellybuyingus.
Adventures of Jellybongus and Jellybongus
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Derek, if you hack me, I’m calling your mom.
Hey, Mrs. Peterson.
Gosh, how have you been?
It’s been a while.
Wow.
You sound great.
Hey, I’m Grump.
I’m not so Grump.
And we’re the Game Grumps.
Oh, here we are.
Oh, my God.
Yes.
How can it be true?
I don’t know how it could be true, you know?
I didn’t realize that.
I don’t know how it could be true, you know?
I didn’t realize that Horse Club Adventures…
Adventures of Jellybongus and Jellybongus.
…was such a huge hit outside of our very niche audience.
I didn’t realize this was, like, a loved game.
I’m legit thrilled.
I’m legit thrilled that we will get to experience
Hazelwood Stories.
Seriously.
What?
It’s great.
It’s just great.
It’s great that we have one.
Oh, I can use a controller, right?
Yeah, of course.
Yeah.
Okay, language.
It’s so magical.
I wonder if it’s going to have the same narrator.
It’s got the same music.
Yes, it sure does.
Wow, where are we now?
What a delightful villa.
I want to be here.
Yeah, this place looks amazing.
How about Profile 1?
This makes me not want to be in L.A. so bad.
I mean, fucking, I’ll just middle it out.
What’s my name?
Men.
Belly-Jingus?
Belly-Jingus.
Wow, look at that. Great name.
Ooh.
Nice coat.
I want spots.
Wow, that’s nice.
Enter your horse’s name.
Belly-Jongus.
Belly-Jongus.
Oh, easy.
Belly-Jongus.
There we go.
Welcome to Horse Club Adventures 2, Hazelwood Stories.
No.
It’s not the same girl.
It’s autumn at Lakeside now.
It’s my favorite season.
Damn it, she sounds like she’s from, like, Ohio.
Hazelwood glaze in the colors of autumn and then leaves Russell under a horse’s hooves.
Calling out on rides is just awesome.
It’s like holding back tears.
We’re so happy to be here.
Shit, I promised I wasn’t going to do this.
The horse club includes Lisa with Storm, Sophia with Blossom, Sarah with Mystery.
And Jennifer with Herpes.
We’ll explore Hazelwood together and have adventures with our horses.
With our horses.
Why?
Why did he leave right before I was going on vacation?
It’s like he did it on purpose.
Lakeside at last.
I’ve been looking forward so much to being here again and to seeing all our friends.
Oh, good.
Sarah and Sophia are already waiting for us with their horses.
Kayen, Storm, Mystery, and Blossom.
There’s definitely some kind of accent going on.
Yeah, they’re already waiting for us being with their horses.
Wow, it’s the same fucking location.
They bought drone technology.
We’re on the beach?
Like the last one?
It’s the same town.
Is it?
Feels a little different.
I mean, the visuals.
Did I shit my pants?
I don’t know.
What the?
Alright.
I mean, accident.
This is not the same run cycle.
No, this is very different.
Wow.
It’s like Ninja Warriors.
I have to greet the girls.
Is there like a ninja run button?
Yeah, here we go.
Horse Club Adventures 2.
Now all pants come pre-shitted.
Look, all my friends have shitted and farted their pants.
Sophia, Lisa, Hannah, Sarah said welcome to Lakeside.
Wow, their mouths move now.
Look at these huge advancements in horse club technology.
I don’t think they were voice acted in the last game.
No, that was us doing it.
Yeah.
Take it easy.
Take me to dinner first.
Come on.
Get on top.
Jelly bangers.
Wow.
Oh, she doesn’t move her mouth.
It’s a blood oath.
Take the dagger.
We need your hand.
Hold out your hand.
Uh, thanks.
Where do I go now?
Go to the mirror.
Oh my god, I shit myself.
How did no one see that during the entire making process of this game?
Belly jingus and belly jongus.
Oh, I already fucking did all this.
That doesn’t look anything like you in the icon.
Well, I think it’s just default art.
Oh, I see.
Ooh, cute little vest.
I love the vest.
Dude, I know.
Still, one of my all time favorite things you’ve ever said was,
oh my god, look at all these cute little riding shirts.
This just came from such an honest place.
All right.
I can’t even see my ears.
Yeah.
Dude, I’m so happy with this outfit.
Damn, I’m adorable.
Yo, my horse, I don’t give a fuck.
Your horse is wearing 80s leg warmers.
Yo, look at that.
Damn.
I could do the Jane Fonda workout.
It’s a little fucking, uh, she’s a maniac, maniac in the stable.
Your floor, yeah, your floor.
Your horse has that, like, side swinging hairstyle.
It’s so dead ass.
I guess.
All right, Hannah, let’s get to the horses.
Shit, shit, wait for me.
Shit, shit.
Guys, guys.
Wait for me.
Shit.
Whoops.
Oh, shit.
I have so many things to try on my outside mirror.
Oh, wait, is the dog still weird?
A little bit.
Oh, it does things now.
It doesn’t just have a blank stare with one foot in the water dish.
They’re like, hurry the fuck up, belly joggers.
Yeah.
Belly jingas.
Once you’re sitting on your horse, you can walk, jump, and sprint, just the same as on
foot.
Oh, okay.
I see.
It’s called a canter, a trot, and a gallop.
We always ride as a group, so it’s best if you see to it that you stay with us.
She’s the base.
Oh, my god, yeah.
In the barbershop quartet.
We always ride as a group.
Hell, yeah.
Let’s ride.
Girls, let’s go.
I love it.
We are so dead ass.
Wait, is dead ass a noun or an adjective?
It’s both.
Really?
Sure.
Okay.
No, it’s sure.
I guess if you had an ass that was dead.
Yeah, that’s a dead ass.
Oh, there’s cars now.
Oh, my god.
That’s terrifying.
Yeah.
The progress has been made.
That’s not an upgrade.
I don’t like that at all.
Yay, they’re still getting muffins.
We could get hit by a car afterwards.
Faster.
No, I’m just going to stop in the road.
I’m going to stop in the road.
Today, we want to take you on a real tour around Hazelwood.
Come on.
Are there really no more cars coming?
They just wanted that for the aesthetic.
That’s pretty great.
Oh, well.
You’ll see.
All right, let’s fucking go, girls.
Yeah.
Let’s fucking trot.
Thus, they began their quest to throw the one ring into the fires of Mount Doom.
Hey, belly jingus.
Let’s get a ride from our friends, the eagles.
You got that ring in your mouth?
I swallowed it.
Oh, no.
Belly jongus.
It’s a hungry, hungry horse.
Does everybody still have shit on their jeans?
Check.
The shit check.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
Remember the night people or whatever they were?
The shadow people?
What?
I don’t remember that.
In the previous game, when they hadn’t revealed the character yet, you just saw the dark outline.
And you were like, we’re all having fun on our horses.
Whee.
Whee.
I’m about to run my friends off the road, dude.
Hey, what the fuck?
Jelly bingus.
You’ll fucking pay for this, belly jingus.
I gotta get used to that belly jingus.
This is the story of Hazelwood, dog.
You better raise your game.
I know.
Look at this little village.
I love these games so much, dude.
Village.
Hurry the fuck up.
Faster.
Faster.
Go, go, go.
Hurry the fuck up.
How come we’re not talking anymore?
I thought we were supposed to have a little chat.
Did I say something weird?
Yeah, things got catty.
Yeah.
This is like a real awkward, quiet trot.
The two are like whispering up there.
She, I don’t, she shouldn’t be allowed in Hazelwood.
I don’t, I don’t think she.
Let’s take a look at Hazelwood.
We did everything for her.
Gang violence capital of the world.
It’s very walkable.
Yeah, I don’t think you have much choice.
Do, do, do.
I had a soccer field.
Thanks, Sarah.
How come you already see it on the sign here?
They’re definitely being catty.
This is Hazelwood.
Yeah, we know.
We know.
From here, we’ll ride once around Hazelwood and show you everything.
Okay.
Cool.
I like Lisa.
I know you do, Arin.
Lisa’s my favorite.
I know.
She’s got a, she’s got a commanding presence.
We’re going to ride around here and hang us.
There’ll be more Indiana Jones.
We walk from here.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Sorry.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Traditionally in battle, people on foot were at a tremendous disadvantage.
You like pull out a mace and just ride them down.
Not the South Koreans.
They created an entire martial art to fight against horses.
Anyway, bye.
Which was that Taekwondo?
Yeah.
Yeah.
All those jumpy kicks.
All those jump kicks.
Can’t can’t fucking stay on a horse when you’re getting kicked in the face.
The real party is at the hot new church downtown.
This is the old stinky church.
We don’t like that.
Megan works there.
Okay, let’s do that.
Nobody else is following.
What the fuck?
That’s okay.
We’re going to stay here.
I’m going to spray paint Episcopalian’s rule Baptist’s drool.
Wow.
What a view.
Let’s go.
Oh, let’s go.
Damn.
What the fuck?
This place is huge.
Just playing Baptist’s.
Got nothing but love for you.
Do you remember all the towns in the first game were just like shacks?
Yeah.
This shit’s like a whole town.
Yes.
Why don’t you get a closer look?
Oh my God.
A real closer look.
Why don’t you get real close to the fence there?
Real close.
Pushing distance.
Oh my God, they’re so mean to each other.
Yeah.
Are you done?
Let’s fucking go.
Let’s go.
We still haven’t visited dead girl cliff.
Where are we going?
Okay.
Is that a raccoon?
What was that to the side?
I don’t know.
Oh yeah.
What the fuck?
What is it?
A lemur.
Wow.
Yeah, it is a raccoon.
Okay.
Very cute.
Okay.
Hurry up.
Geez.
Go.
They’re like, you’ll love the park.
And I’m like, I loved where we were, but we left so quickly.
Do you like the view?
Gotta go.
I’ll show you the view.
Great view, isn’t it?
Let’s go somewhere else.
Oops.
Sorry.
Sorry, horse.
I wish I could just run.
You know, just let me run.
Can I get carrots to give the horse?
Oh, I give the horse a little pet.
You can pet the horse in this game.
That’s nice.
Look at this.
Look at all these buildings and shit.
Dude, are you trying to box her out?
A little bit.
I don’t know.
I’m just trying to make it interesting.
Can we ask the jazz band to turn it down a little bit?
Nope.
Cal Chater on the vibraphone.
Uh-oh.
Did we freeze?
Are we frozen?
No.
E.
Okay.
What the fuck happened?
Did I just lose my controller?
Wow, Arin.
Let’s try again.
These girls were already impatient.
There we go.
All right.
Where’s your controller from?
All right.
Go.
Where the fuck are we going?
Girls, girls, make up your minds.
Are we getting muffins or what?
There’s really no reason for them to have the limit on how you can…
Wow, that car.
Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me.
Sorry.
This bridge is already very old.
We’d be better off riding across it only one at a time.
Okay.
Try not to get hit by a tiny car.
One, two, three, four.
Where’s the fifth?
It’s me.
I am the fifth.
Why would I want to ride slower?
It’s like hot tip, ride slower with left trigger.
The consequences, if you don’t, will be very significant.
But no doubt, it’s a different case with five horses.
Okay.
That is such a weird thing to say.
I know.
And way to say it.
Yeah.
And on we go.
With me, the bridge didn’t even wobble.
But with someone else, I won’t name names.
Perhaps they’ve been enjoying too many muffins down at the smoothie shop?
Sometimes we’re even allowed to ride on the soccer field.
Lisa, you’re great.
Let’s go ride on the soccer field, Lisa.
Please pull it together.
Okay.
Park our horses?
Is that what you say?
Maybe she meant parkour horses and they’re going to do flips.
We can parkour horses over there?
Let’s go to the rooftops, ladies.
But we just did.
Do I look like I give a fuck?
Yes, Lisa.
That’s what I was just explaining.
Take it easy.
Let’s just make sure you don’t set off.
Now we’re coming to the village center of Hazelwood.
Yay.
You look a little, oh, okay.
Floating away, eh?
Oh God, it’s the shit girls.
Hey, please don’t come in the shop.
Told you a thousand times, you got to wash before you get in here.
Please use the drive-through.
Oh my God.
Unlike Sophia.
Cool.
Are we supposed to rearrange these words so they make a sentence?
Except that in the fall, of course, no one goes in the water anymore now.
What?
I love it.
It feels like it was written by the same people from Sealand or, you know, whatever fine country they’re from.
But it was then, the scripts were then given to localized people like from America to read, but they didn’t change the lines at all.
I guess I’ll read it as written.
I mean, I just love it.
It’s so great.
Oh, motherfucker, this fucking wire just like keeps like going out.
I’m sure it does, except that in the fall, of course.
I was like, literally like I was trying to solve a puzzle.
It’s like, there’s got to be a way to say this without not making it make sense.
Okay.
There’s news hanging on the bulletin board. Let’s take a look right away what it says.
Sounds like an idea, great.
Let’s take a look right away what it says.
Everything makes sense when you read it in that voice.
Yeah, of course.
News on the bulletin board.
Contest of photography.
Hey, let me see too.
You’re about to step on my feet.
Come on.
Boo, off.
Wow, a photo contest?
And the best photo series will be shown in Hazelwood?
I like that she’s got like the pinky out of the pocket.
That’s always a cool move.
Like the, you know what I mean?
I have never done that in my life.
I’ve never done it either.
But like, that is really strange.
I’m going to start.
It’s like you’re trying to itch a little bit like you’re like, okay, so.
Hello.
Oh, I remember this guy.
Are you going to compete in it too?
No, the newspaper I work for is hosting it and I’ll be helping to choose the best photo series.
So, do you want to be a part of it?
I feel like we’ve heard this guy’s voice before.
Does it not sound familiar?
The voice actor?
I need to hear again.
Oh my God.
They think as one.
They speak as one.
They are the Borg.
As written probably seems less weird than when you actually just do it like that.
Yeah.
Yeah, sure.
Like, oh my God.
I love, oh man.
Belly jingus.
That’s a great background?
What?
Shit a nice photo?
To do this, go to the green photo dot and press the button which is shown to you.
Okay.
Cheese.
I’m sorry, is this fucking photography human club adventures?
No.
On an outing to Hazelwood.
Got it.
Everyone looks so natural.
You can view the photo right away in the album.
I know you don’t want to miss a second of it.
All right, I got to turn this fucking music down because this shit’s like so overwhelming.
Bring that to a four.
All right.
Okay, so what now?
Look at the photo in the, oh God.
Open up the pause menu and then look at the photo.
Wow.
What a sizzler.
I looked at before.
Wow.
I like the photo.
Great.
I wonder if there’s some service we can do, use to upload it onto our phones where people
can say horrible things about us.
That sounds healthy.
But first of all, we need to do a theme for our photo series before we start taking photos.
No, that’s not, that was not as written.
She said it a different way.
I noticed that.
But first of all, we do need a theme for our photo series before we start taking photos.
Maybe with a muffin we should.
What?
Um.
Chalk it over at cups and zest.
That is so disturbing.
The hive mind.
Sophia Lisa Sarah agrees.
Then have lots of fun photographing and see you soon.
Don’t forget to bring me your photos on time.
Who does he sound like?
I know that voice.
I have no idea.
Is it from a video game?
I’m losing my mind over here.
Are you losing your sight?
Hey, they’re speaking to you.
Oh, I hope not.
It’s like what I’d hear in my dreams.
Thanks, Daniel.
Hey, Daniel.
Go to the bridge.
Don’t you miss Storm when you’re not with him?
Who?
I love the X-Men.
Oh, Storm the horse.
Yeah.
Got it.
Yeah.
This is my horse.
Sure thing.
I miss him.
I miss the horse.
It’s a short thing.
Missing horse.
There’s a shortcut to the cafe through here.
Oh, yay.
The cafe.
Ride our horses.
Oh, is it going to be my favorite?
I hope so.
It’s the event arena, by the way.
Festivals or traveling carnivals are held here in the summer.
Can we?
Please.
My horse.
It’s so impatient.
But when the plaza’s not being used at the moment, we’re allowed to ride on it too.
Okay.
It’s also where the sacrifices take place, so we’ll have a good harvest.
Belly Genghis, would you like to take three guesses who’s getting sacrificed?
Let’s go to the cafe to fatten one of us up.
Yeah.
It’s not anyone from the hive mind, that’s for sure.
And a delicious smoothie.
Yeah.
Let’s get a delicious smoothie.
Sponsored by Jamba Juice.
That would be so funny.
Like if there’s one really obvious plant.
Like, let’s all go to Shake Shack.
Yeah.
God, I used to like smoothies and muffins, but as soon as these Shake Shack burgers with
their Shake Shack shakes came to town, there was no turning back for me.
Yes.
And they all like speak at the same time.
Shake Shack TM is great.
Oh, God.
It’s so weird when they’re synchronized like that.
Yeah.
It’s the Cups and Saddles Cafe.
My two favorite things to eat food out of.
And I’m not talking about drinking cups.
Dismount.
The best muffins.
Nice parking job.
Oh my God.
We’re talking about part Tom, there’s Tom.
Nice that you’re here too.
Hey, Sarah, you back here again for our muffins?
It’s all we do here at Shake Shack.
TM.
The newspaper on Hazelwood is having a photo contest and the best photo series will be
shown on the main square.
Okay.
Wow.
Thanks for that exposition.
And it’s a sure thing you’re competing.
Sure thing.
Yeah.
Same writers.
This is a horse club adventure game.
We wanted to talk it over here.
It’s a lot better with a muffin in your hand.
Is that a euphemism or?
Well, then I don’t want to disturb you.
Here are your muffins and smoothies.
Cool.
Awesome.
Looking forward to diarrhea.
Muffins and smoothies.
Are you kidding?
I would not want to be shaking around on a horse after that.
Who wants to do their insulin shot first?
Life with horses.
Adventure in the saddle.
Adventure in the saddle?
Is that what you said?
Riders ready.
Horses steady.
Go.
I don’t like that one, Lisa.
I think all the ideas are great.
What do you think?
Oh, God.
I have to play favorites now?
I’d go for option four.
Sacrificing the virgin.
Adventures in the saddle sounds the most.
Adventures in the saddle.
Life with riders.
Life rider.
Life ride.
Ride.
Ride.
Ride horses.
Okay.
I’m scared.
I feel like I’m being asked to join a cult every time they get together like that.
Let’s take a photo of cups and saddles right away.
Because it’s the perfect place to meet for us and our horses.
Because it’s a perfect place to meet for us and our horses.
Lisa, you need to go on script.
Welcome to Hazelwood where we dangle all of our participles.
Wait, hold on.
I think I got to change this.
This is so annoying.
Okay.
And there we go.
All right.
Let’s take a picture, shall we?
Dangling participles.
Shoot photo.
Oh, it’s my girlfriend.
She still works here.
The first photo in our own photo series.
Yep.
Titled Creeper.
I just know it’ll be great.
Will we take the next photos first thing tomorrow?
Sure thing.
I thought that maybe we could practice some dressage.
Oh, hell yeah.
That fits in wonderfully with our series.
Sure.
Did her voice raise?
I thought it was lower than that.
Well, whatever.
Just as the deepest of them.
Oh, okay.
First thing tomorrow at Lakeside.
Say, then let’s ride a race to Lakeside.
Did you know that you can-
Why did you move the mouth now but not then?
You can take a look there to see how you can ride to Lakeside.
Did you know that you can always look at the map?
For instance, you can take a look there now to see how you can ride to Lakeside.
Got it.
You’ll find the map in the menu.
Go take a look at it before we ride away.
Now I’m communicating via telepathy.
I gotta talk to my wife.
Where?
Oh, come on.
Oh, they won’t let you.
What the fuck?
Maybe you can talk to Tom and that’ll unlock.
I can’t even talk to fucking Tom.
Not that I wanted to.
My life is a disaster.
Your life, your life, your life is a disaster, disaster, disaster.
Wow, that looks like some kind of cereal.
Whoa, dude.
No, you know what it looks like?
What?
You know when you pour out the freeze-dried cup of noodles and it’s got like the pieces of corn, carrot, and peas?
The corn, peas, and carrot, yeah.
That’s totally it.
That’s exactly what it looks like.
All right, what am I doing here with the map?
I don’t know, man.
A gorgeous first day.
They wanted you to go somewhere.
They want to race.
Oh, shit.
Oh, right, yes.
If you lose, you’re the one who gets sacrificed.
Ooh, are you going to have to do horsey leaps?
Oh, I’m going to have to do some fucking horsey leaps, dude.
This is big.
All right.
All right, we get it.
Jesus.
God, this is like Mario-
Oh, I can hold it.
It’s like Mario Golf when they show you the entire like 18 holes.
Tool, when, go.
I just cut her off, man.
Get out.
Dude, I’m fucking wrecking shit right now.
Quickly.
Quickly, Belly Jungus, leave a trail of road apples to block her path.
For her to slip on.
She will get injured.
Watch out for the fox.
It loves eating horses.
Go.
Hold on.
I’m going to pet my horse real quick.
Now go.
Don’t fail me now.
Ride you mongrel.
Oh my God.
I’m not even halfway done.
That’s okay.
You’re doing well.
Hey.
Watch for the road.
Okay, there it is.
Just make sure the road isn’t going to hit us.
Arin, you’re crushing this.
Yeah, I don’t know where she is right now.
Oh, she’s right on your tail.
Oh my God, never look back.
Bunnies.
Bunnies.
Watch out.
Oh my God.
Wow.
All right, well, they reproduce quickly.
Yeah, they sure do.
Well, not when the mom’s gone.
Oh, Arin, you had to make it so real.
Hey.
Almost, almost.
Get there, get there, get there.
Gold medal.
Yeah, baby.
How do you like that shit?
Hannah’s home run.
You’ll have won three medals.
Hannah gets off her horse, she’s like, fucking, fine.
Hey girl, who is this now?
That’s Mrs. Kramer, the other one you love.
Welcome to Lakeside.
Didn’t he turn the fucking music down?
Why are they so quiet?
It’s his turn down.
We were in Hazelwood, it was great.
The newspaper is having a photo contest, and we signed up too.
Did you?
Boy, I wonder if the photo winner of the photo contest has their shit displayed in the town’s
choir.
All together, no doubt you’ll manage to take love.
I can’t hear Mrs. Kramer.
No doubt you’ll take good photos, sure thing.
But for today, our horses are allowed to take it easy.
I’ll go take care of Cayenne right away.
The pepper?
After a long day, your horse is surely-
Yes, leave me alone with Mrs. Kramer.
Hi.
Love apples?
Go get some from the apple tree over there, and feed your horse with them.
Okay.
Whatever you say, Mrs. Kramer.
I’ll do it, I’ll do it.
I’ll do it, it’s good, it’s fine.
Oh, those apples?
That is a very unusually shaded apple tree.
Yeah, I didn’t know apple trees could turn purple.
I don’t know if they can.
I’m gonna go ahead and turn the voices up.
There you go.
Turn the music to one.
No, Arin, no.
I need it at a three.
It adds so much.
You can still hear it, deuce.
Yeah, you can.
I’m turning it down because it’s fucking loud.
Come on.
Give me the apples.
Oh, they’re all eating the ground.
Gather apples, Arin.
Gather ten apples.
Ew.
Just picking them up off the ground?
You don’t know how long they’ve been there.
They’re good enough for Mrs. Kramer.
I don’t know if I’m into Mrs. Kramer anymore.
Sorry, Mrs. Kramer.
You eat weird apples, and that’s a deal breaker for me.
She’s like, I’m married.
Clearly, I’m married.
Yuck.
You blew it, Mrs. Kramer.
A gorgeous first day.
Wait.
Oh, I gotta feed the apples to jelly, jelly bomb.
Bali, bali, belly jongas.
I’m so sorry.
Crunch, crunch, crunch.
Munch, munch, munch.
You and your horse are even better friends now.
Your horse can now sprint more often.
Because we’re friends?
Okay.
Your horse thought you were a festering piece of shit before.
But as it turns out, you’re okay.
So is my horse not like…
My horse is just like not cooperating?
Is that what the narrative is here?
Your horse has moved down one notch on your list of friends in order of likeliness.
How are they to betray you?
Couldn’t even get that sentence out.
I know, it’s affecting me.
Feed the apples you find by the trees to your horse.
Then the trust between you will grow, which means you’ll be able to work together better.
That is such a fucking roundabout way to say that sentence.
The trust between you will grow like an apple out of the ground.
You can feed the apples you find by the trees to your horse.
You can feed…
I guess that would be the way to write it.
She just said it so like, you can feed the apples you find by the trees.
You can feed your horse with the apples you find by the tree.
Yes.
That would be it.
Apple trees grow everywhere around here.
You’ll find them simply by exploring this world.
They’re bright fuchsia.
Use the apple radar to find the apples.
It will beep loudly and obnoxiously when you’re close to apples.
You can still do small chore quests at Lakeside.
Side quests have nothing to do…
Oh, I’m glad they’re called chore quests.
Yeah, makes it sound fun.
Really exciting.
There’s always something to do here.
Like chores.
…where you’ll find everything to tend your horse.
This is my first side quest for you.
Okay.
People don’t talk like that.
Troll that lives beneath the bridge.
Yeah.
Look in your diary in the menu…
Bring me back three dragon horns.
…so that it’s shown to you.
Scalp the goblin king.
Belly jongus will help you along that path.
Whoa, I just got stuck.
For a second.
Whoa, hello butterfly.
Wow.
Are you trapped in there?
Yeah.
Thank God.
Wanted me to jump over it.
Oh, I have to open the side quest.
Uh, a gorgeous day.
First day.
Ten to…
Oh, side quests.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, shit.
Alright, we gotta run.
But next time on Game Grumps.
Oh, shit.
Okay.
You can find your way around well.
Well, around well.
Well, what?
Where’s the well?
So you can find your way around well.
That one.
It’s a circle, so it won’t be hard.
You can find your way around well.
That’s the end of this sentence.
I freaking love that they made a second one of these.
Oh, yeah, dude.
How glorious.
It’s the fucking exact same.
Like, it’s just the graphics.
It’s the same.
The same people.
It’s just wonderful.
I do love the downtown area, though.
That’s really, really pleasant.
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, that’s progress for you.
Mm-hmm.
Alright, we’ll see you later, everyone.
Bye.
Lots of love.
Jellybuyingus.
Jellybuyingus.
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