somebody touch her my spaghett
I I’m always doing that always oh it’s
just they don’t eat it they just yeah
just want to caress the spooking my
spaghett somebody’s finger at my
spaghetti yes this is a good one for the
cold open because it says doing a very
up-to-date meme the somebody touching my
spaghetti yeah it also looks like I’m
doing important computer over here he’s
he’s hacking in I’m hacking in
[Music]
laughs
hello everyone and welcome back to
weirdest games ever it’s 2023. happy New
Year happy yeah happy New Year of weird
games
[Music]
great this is also with you yeah indeed
and you and yours this is the show where
we play weird video games that were sent
in by you in December just gone thanks
for sending weird games in thank you
they were
um we have three roles on this show only
one of them gets a fancy graphic and the
boring games victim at someone’s bends
by the Box rubbish games master that
means I get a fancy dress thing whoa
yeah yeah yeah
[Music]
useless third party useless third party
uh Peter you are in the hot seat today
you are playing the weirdest game and by
Joe we’re starting this year off with a
banger
is my my lapels touching my Michael I’m
just very much my lapels
let me just bulge my there we go yeah as
it should be yeah excellent today Peter
you’re playing
demolition girl
demolition girl demolition girl uh this
is a very obscure PlayStation 2 game and
you’re gonna learn all about it and
you’re gonna be made to feel
uncomfortable about it and we’re all
going to blame Kieran for it yeah in
just a moment is she like um you know
how we’re trying to get women into like
more manual labor jobs you know get
women to be plastered she’s not working
in construction she’s not okay is she in
a bikini I’m glad you asked yes she is
good but in what context
reap oh what’s going on um red sky at
night Shepard hey there’s a giant lady
there is a giant lady yes woman what do
you want me to do I don’t know what do
you want to do how are you 60 or 50 has
that feel good yeah
all right game is started did that just
say no the question is do we get a
little cutscene before the main menu we
don’t okay good is that her that’s her I
think well we’ve got some little colors
at the bottom
uh for fun yeah those are for later is
that tele text coming through yeah
bursting out Jesus uh would you like to
know a little bit about this it’s just
like the Persona 5 menu wow isn’t it wow
red and black and stylish that’s
incredible also known as the dibesian
the gigantic Beauty demolition girl is a
vehicular combat game developed by
tamsoff for the PS2 and released on the
20th of May my birthday
2004. is she the vehicle no good you
gotta take her out
is that on your on your 12th birthday
this came out I was very excited to get
a copy of the dibesian the gigantic
Beauty which one do you want to do menu
story I like that she’s just kind of
sassing around just being a silhouette
she’s just chilling sketching getting
ready to six missions of story mode here
we go hello I’m Rio Futaba Futaba I’ve
considered to
Nicki Minaj Island okay hour yeah oh the
weather is nice and the shoot is
progressing normally no that’s normal
then that’s what I like for my shoots
pictures are turning out oh really well
she’s got attacked by a crab tiny crab
it got her on the nose oh how bright the
sun right is this going to be a nuke is
this Godzilla no oh uh-oh an alien what
is it
huh what was that what was that what was
it what is it a jellyfish maybe yeah
touch it let’s touch it should be fair I
would touch it too
ah why did it do whatever ocean blur on
her hand I feel dizzy no she’s collapsed
she said that as she fell third oh
[Music]
she’s getting blurry shot yeah a good
measure sure a giant creature appears
emergency news just in from Okinawa
where a gigantic creature of Unknown
Origin has appeared on Nicki Minaj
Island oh no the only thing left in the
area is a television broadcast is
helicopter our mission is to gather data
on the creature and send it back to base
defend the helicopter transporting reho
from the unidentified flying object he’s
beating the game in different ways can
unlock Secret swimsuits for reho oh
Secret swimsuits 10 reporting live from
Nicki Minaj Island where we’ve got a
tree
on our new helicopter our news
helicopter and a machine gun of course
that’s fun you ready salty salty
salty cake cake yes cake yeah what is
the speaker what is pins glasses and
some pinson’s glasses what are those I’m
not sure we’re gonna find out I suppose
Tam news
hello hello
she’s very calm a giant creature
suddenly appeared to the southeast of
minakojima so far no damage been
reported but given its huge size
yeah it is fair that as it moves the
crit will cause damage to private houses
and to the Island’s infrastructure no we
can’t have that according to official
reports a giant creature looks very
similar to a human being weird that with
people clothes therefore it has been
decided that extreme care must be taken
from now on it’s good that her bikini
got big with her because it is the
National Guard is currently handling the
situation stop looking at me yeah they
look to be handled just looks to the
same three as well yeah let’s shoot it
the mission involves measuring the
dimensions of giant girl’s body all
right those are your orders sure I
reckon she’s like a
a b it’s like a a 34C maybe
four trillion 34 trillion c um the road
must be pointed at the same zone for a
few seconds so be careful I wonder which
bits they’ll make you scan
I think you know just um like elbows
head size yeah penis penis Venus so I’m
just gonna say Obviously oh there we go
right so you’ve got breast hips buttocks
and face
the way you should always look at women
that’s how you measure hips buttocks
then if you want 180 seconds for the
breast 150 this is science now 120
seconds but not 130 seconds okay three
minutes of looking at boobs right you
can press up to go forward or down to
retreat hey it’s not go back my breast
hips buttocks and face are up here yeah
right go on oh
what was that
oh my God this is her face what she’s
looking at shouldn’t it was annoys me
when
movies do this I just watched Monsters
versus Aliens the other day great movie
and you know the giant woman in that oh
yeah why isn’t her voice like super deep
because her voice should be crazy that’s
what should happen Cameron Diaz isn’t
she
quit oh it looks like it’s good no it
just suddenly turns I wanted to scan
she doesn’t like it why would she it
kind of reminds me
um Kingdom Hearts the way that like the
the percentage meters there
maybe this inspired Kingdom yeah
oh did you bounce off her oh bloody oh
is she taking a swing at you I think she
just ran full force
there she is Retreat so Retreat wow
destroying things well sort of she’s
she’s standing up yeah she’s kind of
avoiding most most of the houses so I
think what are you going to scan now
buttocks
we have three minutes of scallion oh
you’ve done a bit of faces as well maybe
I’m not really sure what’s happening I
think you have to start with boob that’s
fortunately I can scan boob from behind
oh bloody old do you have a health bar I
don’t think you do do you or is that in
the bottom right I think it’s the color
of your helicopter scanning yeah
okay it’s hip time
[Music]
this is what I that’s what I say when
I’m like you know at the bar data on
chest acquired now focus on hits
have received my
who like some cake or Pepper or
something classes I’m not sure what
those are oh bloody hell you’re shooting
her now yeah pew pew yeah see if you can
destroy this what’s my M weapon how do I
oh oh
I launched a giant game oh my God she’s
sitting down to eat oh so now she’s not
moving around you that’s how you get
with you trapped the woman with it sort
of like a wooden box with a stick
attached to it yeah and and a piece of
string and then some cake in it I guess
maybe quite Continental but cake is a
Girl’s Best Friend it is the amount of
times I get attractive
under it yeah it’s a daily occurrence I
have to call you guys I can’t come into
work right now I’m stuck under it yeah
the cake again it’s because somebody put
a nice slice of Victoria sponge under a
box let’s get another science fact in
here yeah
the game tells the story of rijo oh your
vehicle sustained very serious damage oh
my God she’s just kicked you yeah in the
bottom right I think that’s your color
of your helicopter
underneath I can’t Retreat Retreat let
me show you what happens so you’re
stationary and then you press down
and then it starts going good it takes
it before whatever so it’s really
difficult to um so that what you’re
saying is that there’s a very high skill
ceiling
yeah right so this game tells the story
of rijo a bikini model who becomes a
giant after being stung by some sort of
alien jellyfish you are then given the
task of measuring yeah you take off the
role of a helicopter jet and tank while
reho ran pages around Japan causing
destruction of Mayhem gameplay varies
measuring reho chasing her down a
highway and protecting her sleeping form
from Alien squids while flying over the
ocean
right what a game would you like to see
what that mystery final weapon was yes
please
right through her face what is it look
at her face maybe she’s got glasses on
yeah has it got like a big nose and a
mustache on it no it did there’s some
sort of she she yawning is it some kind
of um
is it sleepy time oh God it’s not
working there we go her hand was in the
way
oh she’s gonna start moving any second
she’s gonna start flailing again
um
69. yes yes okay oh off she goes gotta
go so so close
Mission play come on now we know her
head height yeah that’s what I’m talking
about well they’re saved gotta go
you’re a hero Peter clear time
quite high this much it’s a lot of it’s
a lot of time look at all those times
there fuselage damage I nearly got 100
that you know nearly maxed out the level
well very good
thank you
narcotic shots oh wow okay I’m gonna get
a high special arm can we put speakers
she does a dance oh yeah she’ll dance
won’t she
what are they I know what they do sort
of they made us stand there for a while
but what are they I’ll do the cake again
pretty successful and we’ll we’ll oops
I’ll go around the front and watch her
eat the cake next time because if you
could the important shot that we need
try my very best to get this video
demonetized yeah well that’s already
happened time news Tim tabs what who
since it’s not possible to understand
what her intentions are yeah even though
she can speak the National Guard is
planning to capture rijo fataba by using
an anesthetic okay
right okay oh just a big oh my God it’s
just been surrendered on it this is the
only way could you try talking to her we
know that she’s enticed by cake no one
has tried talking to her yet or putting
cake under a big box
anesthetic in a big cake the largest car
key bust down that building you’ve got
to shoot her in the head maybe what
about the neck or a baby where else do
you um
that’s what girls do isn’t it isn’t it
Skip hello
got yet no
I did it
surely they’ve got to do it in the
vagina now oh yeah oh do I have to do
two shots
that was in the bottom am I missing is
that yeah
that one here it’s going down anyway
maybe the more you counting down before
when I when I hadn’t hit oh god I’ve got
to get round
stay still a cake cake time yeah or
speaker put some music on
okay there we go now get her speak Mr
Speaker dance
fire
here in the spine yeah you’ve got to hit
her in the between the shoulder blades
shoulder blades
here’s a new science bike for you yeah
suck at other territories this was Japan
and Europe exclusive oh yeah what do you
think about it I don’t think this is I
don’t think the Japanese will be into
this game that’s very true this is
extremely European and its sensibility
yeah
why is that not okay it’s giving me some
sort of indicator as though I am doing
it right but it’s going like oh God
she’s so
check it out
I’m stuck in the street Retreat Retreat
I’m trying oh very serious damage oh no
oh she’s coming back for another go
bloody music
that seemed like a good hit oh there’s a
box
and just keep it in the same spot yeah
okay well I might just wait for all yeah
it’s just a countdown timer until you
can shoot her again
spends most of her time just walking
away from me yeah let’s let’s do the
cake let’s it’s cake time yeah don’t
forget the bowl whatever she does with
that
oh
she’s dazed now quick fire
oh hit them titties oh no that one
didn’t last long at all
[Music]
that is how they tend to put women under
our Hospital
anesthetic at uh our boobs yeah new year
new us right yeah what’s she doing now
she’s foraging she’s just painting The
Sea playing with the water
here we go nearly there 30 percent
oh damn it stay still okay now uh bot
bot again I can’t help but notice that
it’s giving us lots of options
um on the left of body parts but it’s
only really going between three
locations oh stop it cake Time cake
tactical game I’m gonna shoot her in her
cake look at the size of that cake
gigantic
it does it looks delicious like a big
cartoon cake head front off hat shoot
her in the face
oh God
but we have no idea I think she is what
her intentions are just have a
conversation with the woman some sort of
creature I don’t I don’t know it looks
like a human what is it it’s an analogy
of being a teenage boy it’s like you
know here is woman what are her
Dimensions I mean a bad teenage boy yeah
no this isn’t how you should be oh she
does and you know she can’t just you
could just speak to her just talk to the
lady talk to them just talk to the nice
lady no no we need to work out our
intentions by oh I don’t know by just
following from a distance yeah
damn it it’s not giving us anything on
the back has it for ages
you know she’s come stop spinning I feel
like there’s no point me even trying to
get around here with your other weapons
isn’t she like gets did she sort of stop
yeah yeah oh
right where’s it gonna be it’s gonna be
head is the best one
sort of
okay front of her legs Jesus and she’s
bending down in front of us building a
look at the people inside like a
sylvanian doll’s house
okay
you’re so close
so close oh come on
that’s it this is done
come on we are waiting for you at base
no
probably Japanese is that your Japanese
so you we can’t it sounds pretty muffled
though
oh oh no oh Lord you’re going down
straight in the bushes third right third
third there’s a speed run of this game
okay yeah uh without loads time included
how fast did Rod G finish this game
pretty quickly 15 minutes
um I’ll say slightly longer uh 20
minutes 15 minutes and 34 seconds
are you Rod G it’s me I’ve played this
game so much
12 inches opened cool cool what does
that mean 25 inches that’s too many
options
the helicopter transporting Rio Futaba
has been attacked on en route by no
unidentified flying objects and is in
grave danger no get to the scene of the
incident immediately and so hang on is
she being dangled it has to be a better
way
yeah that’s stupid wow you’re gonna find
jet oh blue one yeah yeah
or is it purple I think it’s more of a
purple yeah it’s a bit perfectly right
yeah like an indigo missile can’t be
changed laser gun laser gun what do you
want this done a closer shot cool
explosive shot or would you like
explosive shots I would like a bowl
please no more bowls the bowl was
rubbish donkey oh God
Ashton standing by with Tam news just
big chains thanks Ben we’ve just learned
that radio communications with a
helicopter
captain of the vicinity of tamakuni
Island have suddenly stopped oh dear
okay can you tell us more
it is rumored the helicopter has been
attacked excellent right
you still there by a vehicle of unknown
nationality however
what yeah we are still waiting for
official confirmation right we have a
bad line anymore
thank you I’ll keep you updated with
more information when I know it oh a
news just did news just in the
helicopter transporting Rio for taba has
been attacked by unidentified flying
objects we know that you just told us
that we we’re aware anything else people
your mission is to protect both Rio and
the helicopter who knows your name as
Peter our viewers yeah leave immediately
for the sight of the incident what does
that mean yes go
back to you in the studio back to you in
the studio thank you okay
50 UFOs lock on Missile
subarm.com barrel roll
yeah you can roll hell yeah the controls
have changed now you’re working whatever
you’re good at sports you’ll be fun what
are those things
you good no sort yourself out with the
Horizon that’s it so I think can I just
if I press square and oh yeah there’s a
reason I can just turn left and right
okay that’s good kill him shoot oh
it seems there’s a lot of dead zone on
that yeah
sudden acceleration
get them
kill him Peter oh you got one helicopter
damage see if you can get these guys
they’re looking ominous
is Rio okay and marionette says yes yeah
does it just go all the way up and then
all the way back you did it you did one
I’ve powered down which I think makes me
go slower oh we’re sending our best
give him a minute she’s not playing this
game he’s
he’s helicopter yeah he he’s really a
helicopter fighter but we have no other
pie that’s available so we just bungle
them into a jet bungled did you just say
bungled in
what oh there she is oh my God oh God I
hit the girl the titular demolition girl
yes I think sorry I think you mean
the division yeah
the gigantic Beauty right yes sorry both
of these things can be true demolition
girl lock on
was produced uh by D3 under the simple
2000 series umbrella which is a budget
line within which more than 120 games
have been released
it’s like a yellow label yeah but yeah
they just uh this is one of them
surprising for me I thought this would
have been an email full price yeah
18 out of 50. you’re doing really well
your lady is going to die sure you’ve
got 30 the only reason she’s got 30 is
because Peter crashed into her knees
yeah that’s true that’s a good point
he doesn’t do that again
we should be all right
did that oh God it’s just it controls so
badly with this guy going it’s me hello
I’m space jellyfish
oh
you’re gonna explode nah
Peter are you able to move over at all
it looks like you’re barely afraid yeah
I noticed that earlier on in the video I
was leaning in but uh I forgot so thanks
he was just so into it’s great that
we’re nearly done with a video but uh
We’ve realized that now says okay
I’m so hot are they no well they’re
pretty hot yeah actually that’s a good
point
oh that’s good 39 out of 50 only 11 more
you’ve got loads of bogeys ahead
oh God they’re gonna kill you one Health
to fail we’re next time the vehicle is
out of control run away
it’s a good thing we saved
okay well that’s not so bad yeah that’s
all right you can now you know what
you’re doing yeah I’m gonna do it now
forget about it yes what is projectile
right next to me the matching the speed
of that
then along with us but it’s fine
yeah get stuff save our girl get out of
here Alan’s
this time it’s like some of them I can’t
seem to fly any closer to whenever like
reach a certain like look I’m
yeah they’re always matching my speed
yeah
oh
that was pretty good
pew pew pew got some on your waist oh
hello oh look out for this North flank
this helicopter is in a very dangerous
situation you help this helicopter to
hell oh no oh Peter Peter you’ve got
10.10 these guys are the worst
[Applause]
this is one of the hardest games ever
ever made ever Dark Souls of
um like 40-foot bikini girl helicopter
games I’ve got a couple of Amazon
reviews here zombie lord 17916 said
five stars how many stars did he give it
five stars five stars yeah quite know no
that’s true oh Japan how I love your
crazy outlook on things colon
dwell Japan and we’ve got one from Mrs
DJ Gosling
well pleased uh well pleased
scatter shots oh no got a snipe got a
snide oh no Collision on Dead Boys no
Coast on Sundays it’s a single really
isn’t it
they’re making their attack run when
they go into oak oak tree mode
the little sapling the helicopters
I got the wrong tree yeah okay
you’ve got what you were talking about
Pete just had to be yeah I think you
mean that’s what I want my glasses today
you had to do it I’d get something wrong
about dendrologically speaking it’s
absolutely absolutely yeah
he’s gonna do it this time and then
we’re gonna do reviews and then he gets
to go home yeah
all hour
oh this boy oh Lord here coming it’s me
the oak tree oh we got you as well he
was playing the long game these guys
suck
they do you’re nearly halfway yeah yeah
oh no he’s huge surprise where is it
he’s not dead he’s not dead Peter
he lives what where is he
I can’t lock onto him or anything aim up
hey easy
well pleased
nice oh them see
what happens if you drive into the sea
you can’t it just you just skate along
it look oh
oh yeah no no no no no no no no no
oak tree man we’re so far away from her
who doesn’t see her and she’s gigantic
the helicopter is in a very dangerous
situation do it Peter 20 more oh hello
[Music]
you can do it
I think I can hold down my uh
oh oh no I can’t actually hold up
oh look at the projectiles 35 oh those
are flipping okey-doke oh he’s coming
again oh God that guy’s gonna be like
I’m getting my medal today oh got him
kill him
oh that guy just did no again with the
green man no he’s coming again
it’s so hard to control you got him okay
get that guy oh okay that wasn’t meant
for him you’re nearly you’re nearly
there again you get to 43 and they just
go on their crazy runs
that’s it just fly like a lunatic if it
helps yeah just pick off a few more here
we go
[Laughter]
videos
here’s some reviews for you uh there’s
nothing on Magic critic because of
course there isn’t there’s no wikipedia
page either uh what was the average
review score according to 42 users on
game facts 42. oh I bet a lot of them
liked it
why though
um yes four stars so about 80 yeah I’m
gonna go is it in stars is it it’s a
percenter I’ve translated it
um I’m gonna go with yeah I’m gonna go
with 60
55.2 percent I’m pleasantly surprised
there we go uh the highest review score
I could fight there are about two review
two scored reviews on the internet
easily in the first I had to go to the
second page of Google what uh vocal
bunny 74 on game facts said demolition
girl looks good sounds good and it’s fun
while it lasts which admittedly isn’t
very long it’s a budget game though so
at a low price it’s definitely worth it
considering there is nothing else like
it what did Walpole bunny of
gamefaqs.com give it out of 100
uh uh 70 percent
uh
55 60
the lowest review score I could find was
from please call me York on groovy.com I
don’t think I could really recommend
this one to anyone but there is a
certain amount of novelty that will
please those interested in the weirdest
side of the ps2’s catalog hey that’s us
apparently rijo Futaba the demolition
girl herself appears in a couple of
other simple Series games which is kind
of interesting I guess I’d recommend
this game to people who hate audio in
cutscenes instead preferring awkwardly
silent slideshows that feel like they
last forever what did please call me
York give it out of 100
um
35 45 40 and those are my science facts
that was Demolition girl thank you so
much for watching the first episode of
weirdest games ever of 2023 we’ve got
loads of new weird games courtesy of the
caterpill which you should go and watch
if you haven’t already uh and if you
want to share this video there’s a
couple of places you can go isn’t that
right National you can share this video
on the jellyfish subreddit jellyfish or
potentially maybe on the
um giant woman subreddit which I imagine
there will be NSFW giant woman yeah and
then also your friends and your grandma
Yeah tell everyone tell everyone that
will listen all of them and if you go to
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jump and support us at a certain tier
you get episodes of weirdest games ever
how long how long before everyone else
Peter run away
um you get episodes of weirdest games
ever a whole week before everyone else
wow worst games ever a couple of days
before everyone as well as a bunch of
other Awards yeah check that out if you
fancy supporting us on patreon
absolutely thanks for watching everyone
we’ll see you next time bye
How about Demolition Girl? The strangest video game
somebody touch her my spaghett
I I’m always doing that always oh it’s
just they don’t eat it they just yeah
just want to caress the spooking my
spaghett somebody’s finger at my
spaghetti yes this is a good one for the
cold open because it says doing a very
up-to-date meme the somebody touching my
spaghetti yeah it also looks like I’m
doing important computer over here he’s
he’s hacking in I’m hacking in
[Music]
laughs
hello everyone and welcome back to
weirdest games ever it’s 2023. happy New
Year happy yeah happy New Year of weird
games
[Music]
great this is also with you yeah indeed
and you and yours this is the show where
we play weird video games that were sent
in by you in December just gone thanks
for sending weird games in thank you
they were
um we have three roles on this show only
one of them gets a fancy graphic and the
boring games victim at someone’s bends
by the Box rubbish games master that
means I get a fancy dress thing whoa
yeah yeah yeah
[Music]
useless third party useless third party
uh Peter you are in the hot seat today
you are playing the weirdest game and by
Joe we’re starting this year off with a
banger
is my my lapels touching my Michael I’m
just very much my lapels
let me just bulge my there we go yeah as
it should be yeah excellent today Peter
you’re playing
demolition girl
demolition girl demolition girl uh this
is a very obscure PlayStation 2 game and
you’re gonna learn all about it and
you’re gonna be made to feel
uncomfortable about it and we’re all
going to blame Kieran for it yeah in
just a moment is she like um you know
how we’re trying to get women into like
more manual labor jobs you know get
women to be plastered she’s not working
in construction she’s not okay is she in
a bikini I’m glad you asked yes she is
good but in what context
reap oh what’s going on um red sky at
night Shepard hey there’s a giant lady
there is a giant lady yes woman what do
you want me to do I don’t know what do
you want to do how are you 60 or 50 has
that feel good yeah
all right game is started did that just
say no the question is do we get a
little cutscene before the main menu we
don’t okay good is that her that’s her I
think well we’ve got some little colors
at the bottom
uh for fun yeah those are for later is
that tele text coming through yeah
bursting out Jesus uh would you like to
know a little bit about this it’s just
like the Persona 5 menu wow isn’t it wow
red and black and stylish that’s
incredible also known as the dibesian
the gigantic Beauty demolition girl is a
vehicular combat game developed by
tamsoff for the PS2 and released on the
20th of May my birthday
2004. is she the vehicle no good you
gotta take her out
is that on your on your 12th birthday
this came out I was very excited to get
a copy of the dibesian the gigantic
Beauty which one do you want to do menu
story I like that she’s just kind of
sassing around just being a silhouette
she’s just chilling sketching getting
ready to six missions of story mode here
we go hello I’m Rio Futaba Futaba I’ve
considered to
Nicki Minaj Island okay hour yeah oh the
weather is nice and the shoot is
progressing normally no that’s normal
then that’s what I like for my shoots
pictures are turning out oh really well
she’s got attacked by a crab tiny crab
it got her on the nose oh how bright the
sun right is this going to be a nuke is
this Godzilla no oh uh-oh an alien what
is it
huh what was that what was that what was
it what is it a jellyfish maybe yeah
touch it let’s touch it should be fair I
would touch it too
ah why did it do whatever ocean blur on
her hand I feel dizzy no she’s collapsed
she said that as she fell third oh
[Music]
she’s getting blurry shot yeah a good
measure sure a giant creature appears
emergency news just in from Okinawa
where a gigantic creature of Unknown
Origin has appeared on Nicki Minaj
Island oh no the only thing left in the
area is a television broadcast is
helicopter our mission is to gather data
on the creature and send it back to base
defend the helicopter transporting reho
from the unidentified flying object he’s
beating the game in different ways can
unlock Secret swimsuits for reho oh
Secret swimsuits 10 reporting live from
Nicki Minaj Island where we’ve got a
tree
on our new helicopter our news
helicopter and a machine gun of course
that’s fun you ready salty salty
salty cake cake yes cake yeah what is
the speaker what is pins glasses and
some pinson’s glasses what are those I’m
not sure we’re gonna find out I suppose
Tam news
hello hello
she’s very calm a giant creature
suddenly appeared to the southeast of
minakojima so far no damage been
reported but given its huge size
yeah it is fair that as it moves the
crit will cause damage to private houses
and to the Island’s infrastructure no we
can’t have that according to official
reports a giant creature looks very
similar to a human being weird that with
people clothes therefore it has been
decided that extreme care must be taken
from now on it’s good that her bikini
got big with her because it is the
National Guard is currently handling the
situation stop looking at me yeah they
look to be handled just looks to the
same three as well yeah let’s shoot it
the mission involves measuring the
dimensions of giant girl’s body all
right those are your orders sure I
reckon she’s like a
a b it’s like a a 34C maybe
four trillion 34 trillion c um the road
must be pointed at the same zone for a
few seconds so be careful I wonder which
bits they’ll make you scan
I think you know just um like elbows
head size yeah penis penis Venus so I’m
just gonna say Obviously oh there we go
right so you’ve got breast hips buttocks
and face
the way you should always look at women
that’s how you measure hips buttocks
then if you want 180 seconds for the
breast 150 this is science now 120
seconds but not 130 seconds okay three
minutes of looking at boobs right you
can press up to go forward or down to
retreat hey it’s not go back my breast
hips buttocks and face are up here yeah
right go on oh
what was that
oh my God this is her face what she’s
looking at shouldn’t it was annoys me
when
movies do this I just watched Monsters
versus Aliens the other day great movie
and you know the giant woman in that oh
yeah why isn’t her voice like super deep
because her voice should be crazy that’s
what should happen Cameron Diaz isn’t
she
quit oh it looks like it’s good no it
just suddenly turns I wanted to scan
she doesn’t like it why would she it
kind of reminds me
um Kingdom Hearts the way that like the
the percentage meters there
maybe this inspired Kingdom yeah
oh did you bounce off her oh bloody oh
is she taking a swing at you I think she
just ran full force
there she is Retreat so Retreat wow
destroying things well sort of she’s
she’s standing up yeah she’s kind of
avoiding most most of the houses so I
think what are you going to scan now
buttocks
we have three minutes of scallion oh
you’ve done a bit of faces as well maybe
I’m not really sure what’s happening I
think you have to start with boob that’s
fortunately I can scan boob from behind
oh bloody old do you have a health bar I
don’t think you do do you or is that in
the bottom right I think it’s the color
of your helicopter scanning yeah
okay it’s hip time
[Music]
this is what I that’s what I say when
I’m like you know at the bar data on
chest acquired now focus on hits
have received my
who like some cake or Pepper or
something classes I’m not sure what
those are oh bloody hell you’re shooting
her now yeah pew pew yeah see if you can
destroy this what’s my M weapon how do I
oh oh
I launched a giant game oh my God she’s
sitting down to eat oh so now she’s not
moving around you that’s how you get
with you trapped the woman with it sort
of like a wooden box with a stick
attached to it yeah and and a piece of
string and then some cake in it I guess
maybe quite Continental but cake is a
Girl’s Best Friend it is the amount of
times I get attractive
under it yeah it’s a daily occurrence I
have to call you guys I can’t come into
work right now I’m stuck under it yeah
the cake again it’s because somebody put
a nice slice of Victoria sponge under a
box let’s get another science fact in
here yeah
the game tells the story of rijo oh your
vehicle sustained very serious damage oh
my God she’s just kicked you yeah in the
bottom right I think that’s your color
of your helicopter
underneath I can’t Retreat Retreat let
me show you what happens so you’re
stationary and then you press down
and then it starts going good it takes
it before whatever so it’s really
difficult to um so that what you’re
saying is that there’s a very high skill
ceiling
yeah right so this game tells the story
of rijo a bikini model who becomes a
giant after being stung by some sort of
alien jellyfish you are then given the
task of measuring yeah you take off the
role of a helicopter jet and tank while
reho ran pages around Japan causing
destruction of Mayhem gameplay varies
measuring reho chasing her down a
highway and protecting her sleeping form
from Alien squids while flying over the
ocean
right what a game would you like to see
what that mystery final weapon was yes
please
right through her face what is it look
at her face maybe she’s got glasses on
yeah has it got like a big nose and a
mustache on it no it did there’s some
sort of she she yawning is it some kind
of um
is it sleepy time oh God it’s not
working there we go her hand was in the
way
oh she’s gonna start moving any second
she’s gonna start flailing again
um
69. yes yes okay oh off she goes gotta
go so so close
Mission play come on now we know her
head height yeah that’s what I’m talking
about well they’re saved gotta go
you’re a hero Peter clear time
quite high this much it’s a lot of it’s
a lot of time look at all those times
there fuselage damage I nearly got 100
that you know nearly maxed out the level
well very good
thank you
narcotic shots oh wow okay I’m gonna get
a high special arm can we put speakers
she does a dance oh yeah she’ll dance
won’t she
what are they I know what they do sort
of they made us stand there for a while
but what are they I’ll do the cake again
pretty successful and we’ll we’ll oops
I’ll go around the front and watch her
eat the cake next time because if you
could the important shot that we need
try my very best to get this video
demonetized yeah well that’s already
happened time news Tim tabs what who
since it’s not possible to understand
what her intentions are yeah even though
she can speak the National Guard is
planning to capture rijo fataba by using
an anesthetic okay
right okay oh just a big oh my God it’s
just been surrendered on it this is the
only way could you try talking to her we
know that she’s enticed by cake no one
has tried talking to her yet or putting
cake under a big box
anesthetic in a big cake the largest car
key bust down that building you’ve got
to shoot her in the head maybe what
about the neck or a baby where else do
you um
that’s what girls do isn’t it isn’t it
Skip hello
got yet no
I did it
surely they’ve got to do it in the
vagina now oh yeah oh do I have to do
two shots
that was in the bottom am I missing is
that yeah
that one here it’s going down anyway
maybe the more you counting down before
when I when I hadn’t hit oh god I’ve got
to get round
stay still a cake cake time yeah or
speaker put some music on
okay there we go now get her speak Mr
Speaker dance
fire
here in the spine yeah you’ve got to hit
her in the between the shoulder blades
shoulder blades
here’s a new science bike for you yeah
suck at other territories this was Japan
and Europe exclusive oh yeah what do you
think about it I don’t think this is I
don’t think the Japanese will be into
this game that’s very true this is
extremely European and its sensibility
yeah
why is that not okay it’s giving me some
sort of indicator as though I am doing
it right but it’s going like oh God
she’s so
check it out
I’m stuck in the street Retreat Retreat
I’m trying oh very serious damage oh no
oh she’s coming back for another go
bloody music
that seemed like a good hit oh there’s a
box
and just keep it in the same spot yeah
okay well I might just wait for all yeah
it’s just a countdown timer until you
can shoot her again
spends most of her time just walking
away from me yeah let’s let’s do the
cake let’s it’s cake time yeah don’t
forget the bowl whatever she does with
that
oh
she’s dazed now quick fire
oh hit them titties oh no that one
didn’t last long at all
[Music]
that is how they tend to put women under
our Hospital
anesthetic at uh our boobs yeah new year
new us right yeah what’s she doing now
she’s foraging she’s just painting The
Sea playing with the water
here we go nearly there 30 percent
oh damn it stay still okay now uh bot
bot again I can’t help but notice that
it’s giving us lots of options
um on the left of body parts but it’s
only really going between three
locations oh stop it cake Time cake
tactical game I’m gonna shoot her in her
cake look at the size of that cake
gigantic
it does it looks delicious like a big
cartoon cake head front off hat shoot
her in the face
oh God
but we have no idea I think she is what
her intentions are just have a
conversation with the woman some sort of
creature I don’t I don’t know it looks
like a human what is it it’s an analogy
of being a teenage boy it’s like you
know here is woman what are her
Dimensions I mean a bad teenage boy yeah
no this isn’t how you should be oh she
does and you know she can’t just you
could just speak to her just talk to the
lady talk to them just talk to the nice
lady no no we need to work out our
intentions by oh I don’t know by just
following from a distance yeah
damn it it’s not giving us anything on
the back has it for ages
you know she’s come stop spinning I feel
like there’s no point me even trying to
get around here with your other weapons
isn’t she like gets did she sort of stop
yeah yeah oh
right where’s it gonna be it’s gonna be
head is the best one
sort of
okay front of her legs Jesus and she’s
bending down in front of us building a
look at the people inside like a
sylvanian doll’s house
okay
you’re so close
so close oh come on
that’s it this is done
come on we are waiting for you at base
no
probably Japanese is that your Japanese
so you we can’t it sounds pretty muffled
though
oh oh no oh Lord you’re going down
straight in the bushes third right third
third there’s a speed run of this game
okay yeah uh without loads time included
how fast did Rod G finish this game
pretty quickly 15 minutes
um I’ll say slightly longer uh 20
minutes 15 minutes and 34 seconds
are you Rod G it’s me I’ve played this
game so much
12 inches opened cool cool what does
that mean 25 inches that’s too many
options
the helicopter transporting Rio Futaba
has been attacked on en route by no
unidentified flying objects and is in
grave danger no get to the scene of the
incident immediately and so hang on is
she being dangled it has to be a better
way
yeah that’s stupid wow you’re gonna find
jet oh blue one yeah yeah
or is it purple I think it’s more of a
purple yeah it’s a bit perfectly right
yeah like an indigo missile can’t be
changed laser gun laser gun what do you
want this done a closer shot cool
explosive shot or would you like
explosive shots I would like a bowl
please no more bowls the bowl was
rubbish donkey oh God
Ashton standing by with Tam news just
big chains thanks Ben we’ve just learned
that radio communications with a
helicopter
captain of the vicinity of tamakuni
Island have suddenly stopped oh dear
okay can you tell us more
it is rumored the helicopter has been
attacked excellent right
you still there by a vehicle of unknown
nationality however
what yeah we are still waiting for
official confirmation right we have a
bad line anymore
thank you I’ll keep you updated with
more information when I know it oh a
news just did news just in the
helicopter transporting Rio for taba has
been attacked by unidentified flying
objects we know that you just told us
that we we’re aware anything else people
your mission is to protect both Rio and
the helicopter who knows your name as
Peter our viewers yeah leave immediately
for the sight of the incident what does
that mean yes go
back to you in the studio back to you in
the studio thank you okay
50 UFOs lock on Missile
subarm.com barrel roll
yeah you can roll hell yeah the controls
have changed now you’re working whatever
you’re good at sports you’ll be fun what
are those things
you good no sort yourself out with the
Horizon that’s it so I think can I just
if I press square and oh yeah there’s a
reason I can just turn left and right
okay that’s good kill him shoot oh
it seems there’s a lot of dead zone on
that yeah
sudden acceleration
get them
kill him Peter oh you got one helicopter
damage see if you can get these guys
they’re looking ominous
is Rio okay and marionette says yes yeah
does it just go all the way up and then
all the way back you did it you did one
I’ve powered down which I think makes me
go slower oh we’re sending our best
give him a minute she’s not playing this
game he’s
he’s helicopter yeah he he’s really a
helicopter fighter but we have no other
pie that’s available so we just bungle
them into a jet bungled did you just say
bungled in
what oh there she is oh my God oh God I
hit the girl the titular demolition girl
yes I think sorry I think you mean
the division yeah
the gigantic Beauty right yes sorry both
of these things can be true demolition
girl lock on
was produced uh by D3 under the simple
2000 series umbrella which is a budget
line within which more than 120 games
have been released
it’s like a yellow label yeah but yeah
they just uh this is one of them
surprising for me I thought this would
have been an email full price yeah
18 out of 50. you’re doing really well
your lady is going to die sure you’ve
got 30 the only reason she’s got 30 is
because Peter crashed into her knees
yeah that’s true that’s a good point
he doesn’t do that again
we should be all right
did that oh God it’s just it controls so
badly with this guy going it’s me hello
I’m space jellyfish
oh
you’re gonna explode nah
Peter are you able to move over at all
it looks like you’re barely afraid yeah
I noticed that earlier on in the video I
was leaning in but uh I forgot so thanks
he was just so into it’s great that
we’re nearly done with a video but uh
We’ve realized that now says okay
I’m so hot are they no well they’re
pretty hot yeah actually that’s a good
point
oh that’s good 39 out of 50 only 11 more
you’ve got loads of bogeys ahead
oh God they’re gonna kill you one Health
to fail we’re next time the vehicle is
out of control run away
it’s a good thing we saved
okay well that’s not so bad yeah that’s
all right you can now you know what
you’re doing yeah I’m gonna do it now
forget about it yes what is projectile
right next to me the matching the speed
of that
then along with us but it’s fine
yeah get stuff save our girl get out of
here Alan’s
this time it’s like some of them I can’t
seem to fly any closer to whenever like
reach a certain like look I’m
yeah they’re always matching my speed
yeah
oh
that was pretty good
pew pew pew got some on your waist oh
hello oh look out for this North flank
this helicopter is in a very dangerous
situation you help this helicopter to
hell oh no oh Peter Peter you’ve got
10.10 these guys are the worst
[Applause]
this is one of the hardest games ever
ever made ever Dark Souls of
um like 40-foot bikini girl helicopter
games I’ve got a couple of Amazon
reviews here zombie lord 17916 said
five stars how many stars did he give it
five stars five stars yeah quite know no
that’s true oh Japan how I love your
crazy outlook on things colon
dwell Japan and we’ve got one from Mrs
DJ Gosling
well pleased uh well pleased
scatter shots oh no got a snipe got a
snide oh no Collision on Dead Boys no
Coast on Sundays it’s a single really
isn’t it
they’re making their attack run when
they go into oak oak tree mode
the little sapling the helicopters
I got the wrong tree yeah okay
you’ve got what you were talking about
Pete just had to be yeah I think you
mean that’s what I want my glasses today
you had to do it I’d get something wrong
about dendrologically speaking it’s
absolutely absolutely yeah
he’s gonna do it this time and then
we’re gonna do reviews and then he gets
to go home yeah
all hour
oh this boy oh Lord here coming it’s me
the oak tree oh we got you as well he
was playing the long game these guys
suck
they do you’re nearly halfway yeah yeah
oh no he’s huge surprise where is it
he’s not dead he’s not dead Peter
he lives what where is he
I can’t lock onto him or anything aim up
hey easy
well pleased
nice oh them see
what happens if you drive into the sea
you can’t it just you just skate along
it look oh
oh yeah no no no no no no no no no
oak tree man we’re so far away from her
who doesn’t see her and she’s gigantic
the helicopter is in a very dangerous
situation do it Peter 20 more oh hello
[Music]
you can do it
I think I can hold down my uh
oh oh no I can’t actually hold up
oh look at the projectiles 35 oh those
are flipping okey-doke oh he’s coming
again oh God that guy’s gonna be like
I’m getting my medal today oh got him
kill him
oh that guy just did no again with the
green man no he’s coming again
it’s so hard to control you got him okay
get that guy oh okay that wasn’t meant
for him you’re nearly you’re nearly
there again you get to 43 and they just
go on their crazy runs
that’s it just fly like a lunatic if it
helps yeah just pick off a few more here
we go
[Laughter]
videos
here’s some reviews for you uh there’s
nothing on Magic critic because of
course there isn’t there’s no wikipedia
page either uh what was the average
review score according to 42 users on
game facts 42. oh I bet a lot of them
liked it
why though
um yes four stars so about 80 yeah I’m
gonna go is it in stars is it it’s a
percenter I’ve translated it
um I’m gonna go with yeah I’m gonna go
with 60
55.2 percent I’m pleasantly surprised
there we go uh the highest review score
I could fight there are about two review
two scored reviews on the internet
easily in the first I had to go to the
second page of Google what uh vocal
bunny 74 on game facts said demolition
girl looks good sounds good and it’s fun
while it lasts which admittedly isn’t
very long it’s a budget game though so
at a low price it’s definitely worth it
considering there is nothing else like
it what did Walpole bunny of
gamefaqs.com give it out of 100
uh uh 70 percent
uh
55 60
the lowest review score I could find was
from please call me York on groovy.com I
don’t think I could really recommend
this one to anyone but there is a
certain amount of novelty that will
please those interested in the weirdest
side of the ps2’s catalog hey that’s us
apparently rijo Futaba the demolition
girl herself appears in a couple of
other simple Series games which is kind
of interesting I guess I’d recommend
this game to people who hate audio in
cutscenes instead preferring awkwardly
silent slideshows that feel like they
last forever what did please call me
York give it out of 100
um
35 45 40 and those are my science facts
that was Demolition girl thank you so
much for watching the first episode of
weirdest games ever of 2023 we’ve got
loads of new weird games courtesy of the
caterpill which you should go and watch
if you haven’t already uh and if you
want to share this video there’s a
couple of places you can go isn’t that
right National you can share this video
on the jellyfish subreddit jellyfish or
potentially maybe on the
um giant woman subreddit which I imagine
there will be NSFW giant woman yeah and
then also your friends and your grandma
Yeah tell everyone tell everyone that
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how long how long before everyone else
Peter run away
um you get episodes of weirdest games
ever a whole week before everyone else
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absolutely thanks for watching everyone
we’ll see you next time bye
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