10 Naughty Easter Eggs We Can’t Unsee
We all know Easter eggs are a huge thing in gaming, but what happens when they show a little more leg, so to speak? Hi folks, it’s Falcon, and today on Gameranx, 10 Naughty Easter Eggs We Can’t Unsee: Part 2.
Starting off with number ten, it’s Max Payne 3, Amor e Demas.
aka ‘Love and Ladies’.
One of the most memorable things from the original Max Payne games were the television shows.
Once in a while, you could find TVs around, and of course there were TV shows.
If you wanted, you can just stop and watch these things and see stories play out from shows like “Lords and Ladies,” “Dick Justice,” which is a big parody of Max Payne’s love of melodramatic narration, and “Address Unknown,” a psychological thriller.
Max Payne 3 is missing a lot of the weirder aspects of the original games, but that doesn’t mean they’re completely gone.
During the stadium mission, you can actually stop and take in some TV.
At first it’s just news, but if you stick with it, you’ll eventually see a show, “Amor e Demas,” a truly ridiculous telenova that starts off over the top and gets more ridiculous.
Starts off with an appropriately trashy cat fight, which goes on for a while, before things get really weird.
Suddenly, one of them starts to give birth, and the creature that comes out is some goofy-looking baby, demon thing.
(Creature wailing) (Panicked discussion) Just look at this guy, what is happening? It’s insane and actually something we kind of wish we could unsee.
At number nine is The Witcher 3: A Happily Married Couple.
This little moment, which is actually one of the most hidden scenes in the game isn’t particularly strange, but it is embarrassing.
Throughout the game, you’re given the option to seriously pursue Trist or Yennifer.
For most players, it’s assumed you can only romance one, but it is actually possible for Geralt to make his move on both of them with seemingly no negative consequences at first.
Eventually, the two of them figure out what you’ve been doing.
They are sorceresses after all, and it seems like you’d figure that into the equation in doing this but it seems like things are working out in your favor so whatever.
The two of them invite you to a room and put on a show like they’re totally into it before tying Garalt to a bed in his undies, tell him they know what he’s been up to and then they leave.
It takes Dandelion to come rescue you and he makes fun of you.
– Untie me now or you’ll need that gold to replace your teeth.
– (Laughs) You’d have to catch me first, and you don’t exactly look like you’re getting out of here anytime soon.
– I mean, then cuts you loose.
After that, both romance options are dead in the water and there’s nothing you could do to fix it other than reloading an old save and potentially losing dozens of hours of progress.
It’s a secret we’d rather unsee, not necessarily because the content is super risque; It’s pretty mild actually, but if you see it that means you’ve messed up more or less.
Or maybe you didn’t, maybe that was your intent.
I don’t know.
At number eight is the Dead Space remake by all counts, fantastic remake.
They managed to take a great horror game and make it even better.
If you’re expecting a spooky naughty Easter egg, look elsewhere, it’s about to get real stupid.
In the medical section of the ship, in the room where you get the hydrazine tank, there’s a bunch of empty suits lined up against the wall.
One funny thing you can do is use Kenesis to manipulate the arms of the empty suits.
There isn’t really any purpose to it it’s just kind of funny and with the suits lined up the way they are, the developers at EA Motive knew that players were gonna do something dumb.
Like you can take an arm and slap the butt of the suit in front of it.
It’s dumb and totally pointless but you’re gonna laugh your ass off and also slap the suit’s ass off.
I don’t know, actually it’s probably not gonna come off.
Still weirdly hypnotic.
Also, you do it once, you kind of have to do it again.
At number seven is Ratchet and Clank.
I don’t know how to classify this.
In the original release, continuing to flip jumping around The Hoverboard Girl with R1 plus X in a direction causes her breasts to get larger.
The original Ratchet And Clank game is a little different from all the other games in the series these days.
Tone’s a little darker, a little more satirical and it’s got a little bit of that early two thousands edginess.
You know what I’m talking about.
Most of this at least feels like it belongs in the game though, but this Easter egg just it feels outta place in a kid’s game.
On the Planet Rilgar, Starling’s a character you have to talk to to do the hoverboard race.
The design is a little much for a kid’s game, but, but the really, you know over the top ridiculous thing here is that if you take Ratchet and and continuously do flip jumps over her, well, look.
I know what you’re looking at, like why is this here? Obviously this was removed from the 2016 remake and and she was redesigned for that game because it’s a kid’s game, like why was this in the game? And number six is Red Dead Redemption, husband and wife.
Plenty of risque secrets to be found in the Red Dead Games.
The Wild West could be a lawless place.
Of course, all manner of debauchery happened there.
So yeah, you’re gonna see some of that in these games.
One little secret I kind of wish I never saw was found in the Guthrie Farm in Hanover.
You go to this place as part of the debt collection mission and it’s not all that you can find in this place.
Inside a little animal shed on the southern part of the farm, you find a dead guy with his pants down next to a dead sheep with a ribbon around its neck.
This whole scene doesn’t look so good right from the moment you see it.
But if you loot the sheep there’s confirmation.
The sheep had a wedding ring on it, you know, guy loved sheep.
Now he’s dead.
Unclear what did him in, no puncture wounds but I can’t imagine it was anything other than unpleasant.
I don’t know that there’s really a lot to think about here.
Just let’s, let’s move on actually.
At number five is Metal Gear Solid Three, Eva’s Cure Menu Secret.
If there’s one thing you can take away from the Metal Gear Solid series it’s that Hideo Kojima is an alleged horn dog.
Pretty much every game in the series lets you cast a male gaze on the female cast.
And while it’s all inappropriate on some level sometimes it’s kind of like, eh, you know, whatever.
That’s a thing.
This is a thing that we see in life.
It’s not bad to acknowledge it and sometimes it’s, well a little too over the top.
This one secret in MGS three feels a little outta place.
And in the second category, the over the top category.
It’s really all about context.
During the finale of the game where Snake and Eva are escaping from the Russian base after completing their mission, the motorcycle crashes and you and her are forced to proceed on foot, right? Eva actually gets seriously injured from the crash and the entire sequence is a desperate escape through the woods while you’re being hunted by Russian soldiers.
It’s one of the most tense parts of the game and that doesn’t mean that you can’t stop the game, go into the cure menu and look at her through an x-ray.
So you can go into her medical history using this.
You see her food history and for whatever reason you can feed her noodles here which is just odd.
But if you go back to the cure menu Eva will appear in a bikini and will make seductive poses.
Yes, Eva’s supposed to be kind of a bombshell bond girl character for the game.
And yeah, maybe at some other point in the story that would’ve made sense, but not here.
This is not the time.
Things are tense.
People could die.
You are eating noodles and posing like this in a bikini, lady.
Not that it’s actually her.
It’s basically a puppet that Hiteo Kojima is puppeteering.
At Number four is Hitman: Blood Money’s mystery coin.
The recent Hitman games have had their fair share of weird Easter eggs, to say the very least.
But those are far from the only games in the series that get silly.
The Hitman games have had Easter eggs right from the beginning and a lot of ’em are just as weird as anything found in the recent trilogy.
Take for example, Blood Money on the mission ‘Till Death Do Us Part’ the one set in the bio mission during a wedding.
You can find this area where some guys are fighting each other for whatever reason.
If you go northwest from those guys you can find a very small, easy to miss coin on the ground.
And if you shoot it, then all the guys who are just fighting suddenly become naked and run up to you and clap.
Shooting that coin just unlocked their new found love of the nudist lifestyle, I guess.
Also made them pacifist.
They were fighting.
Now they’re not.
Now they do get bored of of clapping after a while and remember their problems.
The pacifism fades and they get back to fighting but their clothes don’t go back on.
is it fighting? I don’t, I don’t know.
If it counts as fighting, then.
It counts as something, but I don’t know if fighting is the thing that it counts as.
And number three, Banjo-Tooie’s Pterodactyl Land trick.
I don’t know why, but there’s something about British developers like Rare where they just can’t help themselves.
Even when they’re making cute little games meant for kids, they have to sneak in some rude humor to amuse themselves.
And while most of it pretty harmless, there’s one secret I’d prefer if I’d never seen it.
Found in Pterodactyl land, the fifth main level of game; There’s a little pathway that leads to Mumbo Jumbo’s hut.
From the ground it doesn’t look like anything in particular but if you get high up, err t-t-there it is.
Rare manage to sneak in a crude drawing into an officially licensed Nintendo game.
There’s even a few drops of pee.
Like gotta make sure you know what you’re looking at.
Errr it makes pee.
If it was just a little drawing that you passed by, it wouldn’t really be a big deal.
But you gotta go back and forth on that thing constantly, and backtracking this level’s bad enough.
Did they really make you have to walk over drawing too? I don’t know.
It actually is kind of funny that they forced you to look at this stupid thing.
At number two is Janitor Bob’s secret from Sin.
To call Sin a juvenile game would be a massive understatement.
It’s a game designed for 12 year old boys and that’s the only explanation.
You play as Blade, You’re taking on the ridiculous Alexis Sinclair.
Eventually you make it to her secret underground castle, because that’s in the game.
And if you take time and explore, you can find a hidden passage to Janitor Bob’s room.
Inside, there’s some posters and a camera monitor that shows the evil villain erm taking a bath.
Kind of sounds like a private moment.
And if you noclip over to the room, that confirms it.
If you’ve ever wanted to see a low polygon lump of pixels that vaguely resembles the shape of a woman playing the one armed bandit.
There you go.
Embarrassing enough to talk about it.
Maybe I need some brain bleach.
Anybody got some brain bleach? And at number one Kirby’s Dreamland 2’s naked lady.
Last thing I would’ve expected to find in a Kirby Game; A series known for being family friendly and pretty inoffensive.
But there’s at least one risqué thing you can find in Kirby’s second adventure on the Gameboy.
On level five five there’s a secret section that takes you to this vertical room with a bunch of floating blocks.
Doesn’t really look like much from close up but when you zoom out, you can see that the blocks are arranged in a vague approximation of an naked woman, in a Kirby game.
Why? I don’t know.
Nobody from Nintendo’s actually commented on this or attempted to explain what it’s supposed to be.
It’s just there.
So I guess there’s a little plausible deniability there.
It’s such a crude drawing that somebody could easily claim it’s supposed to be something else but I’m pretty sure it’s supposed to be a woman.
What else, realistically is that supposed to be? And that’s all for today.
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