Screw it, Katamari.
Hey, I’m Grump! I’m not so Grump!
And we’re the Game Grumps!
Well, this is an unexpected pleasure.
What a turn!
Uh, this is, uh, Katamari Damasheh.
What do you mean?
Like, what was the name of this one?
Oh, this is the first one, but it’s the remake, so it’s called Katamari Damashe Reroll.
So we played this once before, years ago,
uh, but apparently my microphone was off at the time.
Um, but now, we’ve got a- we’ve got a- an audio readout right in front of us,
so I can actually see my words.
In a- in WAV file format.
And, uh, we’re just gonna play it a little bit to, uh, you know,
take a little trip down memory lane and finally get one on the books,
where you can actually hear me.
Wouldn’t that be so fucked up if we went through all this trouble?
Kill the guy!
Wait, sorry, what?
And- and- and it just didn’t work anymo- it didn’t work again?
Yeah, it would be fucked up.
Go to Space Mushroom?
Of course I’m going to Space Mushroom!
You think I would go to Space Mushroom under these conditions?
Oh, I wanna be this one.
Aw, June. Adorable.
I like the pattern.
Very- very, like, 70s wallpaper.
I think I’ve choo- chosen June.
I think so, too.
So now I will get the fuck out of here.
How do I get the fuck out of here?
Oh, there we go.
I wanna go and roll some shit up, dawg.
If you never played Katamari Damacy,
well then get ready.
Cause we’re gonna play it.
Alright, yeah, cause it’s- you’re watching it happen right now.
Magandang Tanghe Holipu.
Have you ever been to the Philippines?
We st- wait, I gotta give this guy more regal.
Have you ever been to the Philippines?
We stopped in the day before yesterday.
We hope you can visit during the day’s rolling.
Like that’s possible.
A royal present for the hard-working prince.
God, like you- I forgot how much of my junk you can-
There’s so much junk and you- there’s so much going on down there.
Like right in his face.
It’s like, yeah.
It’s gonna like thump down on the earth.
That’s- that’s what we were thinking. Is that the royal we? As in like-
I think so, yes.
While playing catch with your present.
And it went down to earth.
Just fell to earth.
Like David Bowie.
Must be around somewhere, so roll it up while you’re at it.
Smoke it if you got it.
Sending things to earth.
Get out of here, pointer finger.
Today, you’ll be rolling inside the house.
The Katamari should be, let’s say, around a full 20 centimeters.
Dude, I can’t get that big, dawg.
We can believe in you for seven minutes in earth time.
Oh my god.
But any longer than that and even the king of all cosmos can’t be expected to wait.
We look forward to a nice Katamari mini-prince.
Oh, this is the fucking-
Man, I haven’t seen this in years.
It’s fucking great.
It really takes me back.
It just makes me smile the moment it comes on.
And it’s just like, it’s just good vibes.
And you know, it reminds me of being a teenager in my teenage years.
Well, that’s the best time to be a teenager.
And all my friends, I would go and see my friends when I had those.
And it would just be such a great-
Yeah, you don’t have any friends now.
I mean, I can’t even think of any off the top of my head.
Yeah, I mean, it’s such a lonely time.
Why would you think of dear friends who love you?
I’m on a Discord with them still, so it’s kind of like-
Oh, you son of a bitch.
I’m on a Discord with them.
Well, I used to go over to their house every weekend, one of them.
But never mind though, because I didn’t really have a whole lot going on in my place.
Discord’s going to be big now.
Now that Twitter and TikTok are having troubles.
What’s wrong with TikTok?
Well, a couple of people from the government came out and were like,
we’re going to try to see if we can get this banned across the board.
That was a while ago though, wasn’t it?
Yeah, like a week.
No, that was like months ago.
Oh, well, I think there was some sort of like-
That’s when we had a different president.
Yeah, no, it’s definitely happened anew.
Because they had some kind of like, okay, spying is definitely occurring through this.
I don’t know if they’ll do it or not.
It just might happen.
Wait, so they’ve proven that there’s TikTok spies?
Which is hilarious.
I believe so.
Man, now that I don’t want to disseminate misinformation.
You know what?
Why don’t I just look up the thing?
Why don’t I look it up on the misinformation machine?
Yeah, this will be a fun way to spend our time.
This palate cleanser episode.
Do it, do it.
TikTok bans hit more US states.
Security firm says most access is lost globally.
What the TikTok government ban means for you.
What the fuck?
Well, that makes it easy because I never wanted to learn it in the first place.
You know, it’s like when you do a thing like we do, right, and you’re on the internet,
it’s like, oh, you got to learn the new social media platform.
I didn’t want to learn fucking TikTok, and now I don’t have to.
Pelosi pushes to include TikTok ban in $1.7 trillion spending bill.
Well, that’s wonderful.
That’s a lot of money.
Why would they spend it on trains when they could spend it on banning TikTok?
I’m pretty sure the banning TikTok is not the entirety of the one, almost $2 billion
A trillion dollars worth of it?
You’d be surprised, Dan.
And Twitter’s having difficulties for some reason I can’t think of.
I can’t think of it off the top of my head.
So, Discord might be people’s jams.
Well, it already is.
I use it all the time.
I mean, listen, man, when it comes to communications with my friends that I absolutely have,
I can’t really think of any off the top of my head right now, but when I do remember
that I have friends, then I use Discord, because it’s just easy, and everyone’s together,
and I can just send out a signal of like, hey, three people.
Yeah, if I had friends, I mean, that’d be great.
But unfortunately, the only time I even say Discord is when people ask me which chord
will I be using.
Dan, we’re gonna have to know.
Cut that part out, please.
Wait, are you making it too big, Arin?
I thought it was supposed to be 20 centimeters.
It is, but I’m making it awesome.
He dropped a ring or something, and I’m trying to find, what did he say he dropped?
I thought, like, if you make it too big, then-
That’s only certain missions.
And it won’t tell you.
You have to guess.
Well, it’ll tell you what size it wants it, but it won’t tell you, like, how big it is
Is up in the right corner how much time you have left?
I’m trying to scoop up everything, bro.
Because I was gonna say, like, three seconds, you better get that tight little ass here.
Thank you, Dan.
Something about saying that to a 35-year-old man is super funny.
You didn’t get a tight little ass over it.
It’s not the first time I heard it today.
Big ol’ Monday for Arin Hansen.
Every Monday’s a big Monday for me.
For Arin TLA Hansen.
Stinks for the tight little ass.
I got the fucking cans, bro.
What was that TLC, the learning channel thing you showed me?
Wait, I saved it.
It was so funny.
Did I send it to you?
Yes, you did.
And I screenshotted it because it was so fucking funny.
I posted it on Twitter.
That same gag.
So people have seen it.
Because everybody who watches Game Grumps subscribed to my Twitter, right?
As they should be.
Game Grumps has five point something million subscribers and my Twitter has a million.
That’s too many.
So that’s, get with it.
If you’re not subscribed to my Twitter, you better fucking do it, baby.
Nothing but bangers over there.
For anyone who doesn’t know, TLC, the channel, used to stand for the learning channel.
And then they shortened it to TLC when they immediately got rid of all their educational programming.
So this was a tweet of theirs that Arin showed me.
Welcome to hashtag MILF manor.
Eight hot moms leave home for the chance to find love with men half their age.
But they’re greeted with a shocking twist.
The new series premieres January 15th at 10 p.m. on the learning channel.
That is hilarious.
MILF manor, man.
I gotta be honest.
I’m watching that shit.
38 seconds left, dog.
Oh, that’s okay.
Are you close to the beginning?
I’m, I fucking finished this shit, man.
Oh, he’s just gonna stop you?
Yeah, I’m just.
I thought maybe you had like a base location that you had to return to.
Nah, I’m just doing extra credit.
Is he gonna say weird stuff about it?
Yeah, of course.
Shit, I’m losing.
That’s what I like.
Hurry up, baby.
Lock up, baby.
Oops, oops, oops.
Shit, shit, shit, shit.
Did we get these leaves yet?
You got a magnet.
It was boring to watch this whole time.
Well, it’s not like our livelihood depends on it or anything.
We are moved to tears by the size of this thing.
This is so incredible.
I’m fucking awesome.
Happy, happy, so happy.
We want to turn it into a star right now.
I’m the star, baby.
You did that fast.
You hit the goal awfully fast.
That was fantastic.
That was so speedy and so smart.
Yo, you hit the whip so fast.
It will be shooting star like boom.
Oh, I thought I said 8,000 millimeters, meters.
This is our royal present.
Guess what this is?
The thing that you collected the most of is my earth really is full of things.
What a poignant thing to say.
We will now release it into the sky.
Is this game like secretly about like wasteful products?
Like there’s too much.
Roll it all up.
Let’s roll up the world.
Oh, I can feel it.
I can feel the cosmos.
That’s you, Arin.
Oh, they’re speaking in Japanese.
That’s not good.
We need the dub.
You do the dub.
Say the dub.
Well, the dub was so much better.
It was like the cause is being infesticated.
Well, then do that.
You just did it with your mouth.
That’s how you’re going to get the dub.
No, because the little girl.
Winner, winner, chicken dinner.
The girl, the little girl.
She had this great voice that was like, oh, hi, I’m the little girl.
It was so like, whatever.
Well, that’ll incentivize people to watch our previous playthrough of this.
Dude, that’s not what the goal is to this, but if you want to, you can go watch the old one.
Have you ever been to Portugal?
We were there yesterday.
I want to go to Portugal.
They have a Miragaya.
What is that?
A really like unusual type of Stegosaur that at the, I think it’s in Lorena, Portugal at
a place called Dino Park.
It’s a Stegosaur with really small plates.
It’s spelled M I R A G A I A.
I thought it was Miragia.
Maybe it’s like a grown Stegosaurus and then the plates are like baby Stegosaurus plates.
It is its own species, but it lives in Portugal or it lived in Portugal.
If it lives in Portugal, then you better, I’m there tomorrow.
I want to meet a living Stegosaurus.
What if they do that, man?
What if they Jurassic Park that shit?
Then that would be freaking awesome.
Maybe not for the animal, but it’d be awesome for me to see a living dinosaur.
I don’t know, man.
Like maybe it would fit right in.
Maybe they treat it like gold.
I don’t know.
What do you mean?
You know, they, how they, the way they treat pandas so well in zoos because, um, you know,
they’re endangered and it’s, it’s a, it’s a marvel.
Like they work so hard to help them breed.
I mean, every time I see footage of a panda at the San Diego zoo, it’s always like making
a little slide out of snow and then sliding on its back with its arms out.
And I’m like, that panda is loving life.
Yeah. Cause they’re just like constantly forcing it to fuck.
I wouldn’t say it like that.
I would say constantly persuading, encourage breeding.
God, man, just got to put the worst possible spin on things.
You think that panda is going to be upset that introducing it to a beautiful female panda.
If I was in a zoo and they were like, Hey, what do you think?
I’d be like, hell yeah, dog.
That would be my fucking, that would be life dude.
That would be the greatest.
That would be the goat.
So what’s the problem here?
That’s what I’m saying.
Panda’s life is great.
The fuck all day.
You use the word forcing and I was, I think that’s where it went wrong.
You never want to use that word.
That’s not what I’m saying.
I’m saying encouraging.
They want the panda to fuck all the time.
So they’re constantly like, Hey man, fucking do it.
And then he’s like, all right.
I’m not saying he’s like not into it.
He’s totally into it.
As I would be as a panda.
Great job saying that right at the end.
Just hearing you go like, man, I would fuck a panda.
Of course they’re in danger.
Chances are running out.
I’d want to make more panda babies because I get to fuck as a panda all the time.
I mean, the panda has no idea it’s endangered.
The panda only knows it’s a media environment.
Well, it knows there’s not a whole lot of pandas around.
It knows that much.
I suppose you’re right.
Cause a panda, if a panda was in the wild with other, a lot of other pandas, he’d be
like, damn shit.
There’s a lot of pandas dog, but in a zoo there’s like what?
Maybe another one other panda.
But like I’m just saying like the panda like wouldn’t know that on a global scale.
It’s not like the last unicorn where it’s like, am I truly the last?
It’s just a fucking panda hanging out, making little fun snow slides.
But no, no other creatures know that either.
They don’t give a fuck.
Fucking, there could be two fish and they’d be like, I guess there’s two fish ever.
It’s, it’s true.
There’s so many fish.
There is so many fish.
I’m surprised there’s so many left after all the sushi we eat.
But yeah, I agree.
There’s so many fish.
That’s why I’m asking you this, Dan.
And this is one you’ve heard that thing.
How many are there?
Which are there more of wheels or doors?
Oh, that’s a great question.
I would have.
It’s a tough one.
It’s very tough.
I’m going to say doors.
Because I feel like there must be more houses than vehicles in the world.
Well, it’s not necessarily all vehicles.
What about like wheelbarrows?
And it’s not, oh, and it’s not necessarily all houses, just any building.
What about big rigs?
Yeah, no, I agree.
What about furniture that has wheels on it?
No, I’m still going to say buildings.
I’m still going to say doors, rather.
Is it doors?
How am I supposed to know?
How is anyone supposed to know?
That’s a fun question.
I don’t know.
I thought you were going to, yeah, I just, like you assume every building has at least
a few doors on it.
Whereas you have unicycles, which is just one wheel.
Yeah, but then you have, then you have a lot of, you got big rigs, you got trains.
Trains have more wheels than doors.
I mean, cars are a wash, right?
You get four doors, you get four wheels.
Yeah, unless it’s just two door.
Unless it’s a two door, which means there’s more wheels, which is, which is my argument.
You think there are more wheels than doors in the world?
I’m not saying one way or the other.
I’m just playing Deadpool’s advocate here.
He’s been dead for a while.
And he needs someone to advocate for him.
He can’t speak for himself anymore.
Listening, talking to you when you’re slightly tipsy.
It’s, it’s such a mix of like your natural intelligence and also the dumbness of like
drinking, put together.
It’s really funny.
I got there that fast.
All I know for a fact.
Is that if I had said wheels, you would be going off on how many doors there are in the
That’s what I’m saying.
This was a fucking trap question and I walked right into it.
That’s why it’s so great.
I came up with one because I was like, there’s gotta be other stuff where this, this question
And so far I’ve had a lot of success with this one.
What are there more of in the world?
Eyes or legs?
Because when you think of bugs, like think of a millipede, that’s two eyes and like a
thousand legs right there.
So that’s what I think.
What about fish?
Oh, fuck you.
That’s an outstanding point.
That’s a lot of fucking fish out there.
I feel like in, uh, uh, Phoenix Wright, ace attorney, when like the opposing lawyer lands
a good argument, it’s like,
What about fish?
Yeah, like you have action lines all around your pointing fingers.
I know I’m still going to say it because there’s so many more insects than fish.
There’s so many more insects make up like 90% of life on earth.
But there’s a lot of insects that have multiple eyes too.
There are, but they have more legs than eyes sometimes.
Most of the time you skank.
That’s not how many fit.
That’s something we can look up.
How many, roughly how many insects are there?
I already started looking this up.
How do they even know?
Is there like a census?
I don’t think there’s any way to find out.
I mean, according to, uh, r slash ask Reddit, most of the comments, well, if Reddit said
it, then there’s more insects than fish.
Oh, well, I mean, that’s, yeah, that’s, did somebody ask that question?
That’s what I mean.
I literally looked this up.
I, I, I believe I have heard biologists say that insects make up, um, like a huge percentage
of life on earth.
Well, I believe that this question was asked nine years ago.
And even, Oh, well, it might’ve changed since then.
A lot of fish.
Do you know how fish reproduce?
They don’t, they don’t have sex.
They just spray their jizz all over eggs.
It’s a spray.
The female lays the eggs on the bottom of the ocean floor or whatever body of water
they happen to be in.
And then the male, uh, flies over them and by flies, I mean, swims and it just, it’s
like sea flying.
And just like jizzing up a storm, a curtain of jizz.
And uh, and then that fertilizes the eggs.
And then you swim through that.
Fish are dating in it.
Yeah, fish are dating.
What a nice way to say it.
It’s from Rocco.
It’s well, the original quote was from, uh, W.C. fields because he was an alcoholic and
people asked him like, why do you drink so much alcohol?
Why don’t you try drinking water?
And he’s like, water, never touch the stuff.
Fish fucking it.
Which I love.
Never touch the stuff.
I mean, it’s so funny.
This is an old timey fucking, he was, he was that guy.
That was his voice.
That’s like so parodied.
I love listening to old like news radio stuff where they’re just like, yeah, there really
was that sponsored by fishy fish fish quote unquote newscaster voice.
Get that cat.
Get that cat.
I didn’t already have a cat though.
So don’t worry about it.
I have a cat.
I see them struggling for life.
There’s a dog in there too.
We just remembered something we have to do.
We’re zipping back to space now.
Man, I got to think of a different I potatoes.
We are potatoes have a lot of eyes.
No, just cause we call them eyes doesn’t mean they’re ocular organs, but they are called
And every human being cause we refer to ourselves as I and the letter I people write it down
No, I E Y E.
You did it.
What character grow?
We spell that I like the I make a star.
I’m going to make cancer.
That’s not cool.
No, it’s the constellation.
Oh, got it.
What is it?
We get it.
It just doesn’t look delicious.
The sky does not seem yummy at all.
Everyone is still hungry.
Can’t you see that?
Speaking of delicious, we say crab most certainly crab.
We’re doing sending things to earth looks yummy, but no, no, not yet.
Patience is a virtue focus.
We must focus to make the yummiest cancer possible.
Hey, did they not know what they were doing?
All you have to do is roll up as many, many, many crabs as you can find.
You have seven minutes.
We look forward to a mouthwatering Katamari callow prints.
I’m already doing work.
Hasn’t even started yet.
What does callow mean?
I don’t know.
Thank you, Ali.
That’s a spider, man.
Not a crab.
Callow means inexperienced and immature.
That makes sense in this context.
It doesn’t matter if I get non-crabs.
I thought it had to be exclusively crabs.
Nah, it’s just counting the crabs.
If I get bigger by getting other stuff that aren’t crabs, then I can roll up more crabs.
Get bigger crabs, guys.
I like the singing on this song.
It’s kind of frantic, eh?
Gotta get a vegetable inside my tummy so I can have fiber and I can sit on the leaf.
You are wasting way too much time gathering tomatoes when you should be getting crabs.
I’m trying to eat crabs with Saul.
A lot of the crabs are way too big.
They’re way too sizable for my tiny little ball.
I need more other stuff.
You know, big enough for the red crabs.
More all things.
It’s great for me.
I can just get a whole new crab tier.
That’s a crab party.
Have you ever seen the video of that crab crossing bridge?
And there’s just like tens of thousands of crabs scuttling across the bridge.
It’s very amazing and somewhat upsetting somehow.
Well, they’re so like skittery.
I feel like we as humans have like a natural impulse to repulse by like that skittering
motion because of like the spiders and shit.
The creepy crawlies.
It’s like, oh, don’t bite me.
Don’t bite me, bro.
Don’t tase me, bro.
Remember don’t tase me, bro.
I do remember it.
I just said it.
I feel like I met somebody recently who was like, I know that guy.
I wonder what he’s doing now.
I’m not getting tased.
I was just going to say, I’m probably getting tased.
Oh, you can get green crabs.
I just leveled up the green crab level.
You’re not a fire extinguisher level.
What do you think?
You’re losing green crabs.
I didn’t realize.
So when I- Oh, that’s a horseshoe crab.
Does that count?
Oh, hell yeah.
There’s a crab in the name.
These little insects.
What is this?
A beetle fight?
That’s two fighting beetles, not a crab.
So I know-
Get those crabs in the pans.
There’s a blue crab that you don’t have yet, I don’t believe.
I have one blue crab so far.
Oh, I do see one in there.
So I noticed this, or I realized this recently when you sent me American Psycho parody.
I was just thinking of that.
And there’s a line in my console versus PC video where David- No, not David DeBergak,
Hugh Jackman, who I’ve retroactively named in a video somewhere.
He says, yeah, what do you think?
And I always thought when I quoted what do you think, even in that context, that it was
just from that cartoon.
But I realized that that was on my mind because American Psycho.
He’s like, what do you think?
Oh, when they’re talking about the business cards, yeah, yeah, yeah.
First of all, I should say, I can’t remember who it was, but thank you to the several fans
who sent me the remix, I guess would be the word, of someone did audio of the scene in
American Psycho where they’re all comparing business cards and you hear Patrick Bateman’s
inner monologue, like a version.
Did you see this, Allie?
I have seen many versions of this, I’m so curious.
This is the version where they’re comparing OC characters from Sonic that they created.
It is so funny.
He’s like, my God, it tastes the thickness of it.
It’s really great.
I’ll show it to you afterwards.
Yeah, I sent that to Arin and Arin, you will usually send me either LMAO or a haha, but
that was the first time I’ve ever received an, oh my God, LMAO.
So I knew it really landed and that made me very happy.
So thanks to people who sent me that.
And whoever did the impressions did like a really bang up job.
It’s very, very good.
Because those guys.
I don’t think you got the crabs in the pans.
The whole point of that movie is that everyone kind of sounds the same, but like, you know,
Van Patten and Patrick and they all have slightly different cadences and they like nailed it.
Oh no, no.
Flick around, uh, past the paper door, there’s a crab, oh no, no, no.
On the other side, like on the other side of the outside.
Oh, you missed the blue crab.
Blue crab in a pan.
Blue crab in a pan.
You were obsessed because it’s fucking blue.
That’s why you wanted me to do it.
I was obsessed because it was a crab and you eat crabs and you’re rolling around in a field
of nothing and there’s two delicious skittery crabs just being like, me, me, me.
But let’s be real.
You wanted me to do it because it’s blue.
I like things that are blue for sure.
You were like all up.
Stop, stop spitting out crabs.
Just get me out of here.
You’re shooting crabs off.
Do I have to get up there?
How do I get up there now?
I don’t know.
Oh, oh, this is how I get up there.
I love your time.
Come on baby.
Lock up baby.
Here we go.
Get him, yeah.
Wow, he latched on to the horseshoe crab.
How big does this need to be?
It just needs a lot of crabs.
Will you lose crabs?
There’s a lot of crabs everywhere.
I think you sucked up most of the crabs.
Well, there’s a lot of crabs in that little doghouse I can’t get to now because I’m too
Yeah, see, that’s sometimes the problem with being so big.
You fucked up.
Same with this little area over here.
There’s a crab.
A lot of tiny crabs.
It doesn’t matter how big they are.
There’s a fiddler crab.
No, you’re all right.
No, but I want to, ugh, but I want to, ugh, but I want to eee, but I want to oooh, ugh,
See, there’s a lot of crabs over here, but I can’t fit.
Yeah, it’s all right.
It’s all right.
You’ll just mash off important crabs.
Oh, you son of a bitch.
You thought you could get away, fiddler crab.
You sloopy crab.
But you couldn’t.
That’s like fucking every crab, dude.
Now you’re lunch.
I feel pretty confident about my crab situation.
That looks delicious, but also slightly disturbing.
Let’s take the yum yum rainbow back.
You got it.
I don’t recall it being that the last time, but that’s fine.
Too crab intensive and kind of gross.
A hundred and thirteen crabs?
This is it.
This is what we wanted.
This is it, chief.
A sea of crab meat.
This looks incredibly yummy.
The king looks so happy.
We are one step-
I’m like, all right.
We are one step closer to the finest starry sky there is, and I’m about to break.
We are drooling.
Let’s just release it into the sky.
There was something really disturbing about his smile.
It was just, I’ve never seen him so happy.
Eighty four percent.
Good job, man.
I can feel it.
I feel the cosmos.
I feel the cosmos.
It’s so iconic.
She’s like, oh, I can feel it.
I feel the cosmos.
Because her American voice is so good.
They put it on the fucking actually good voice acted Japanese version.
It’s like, I don’t need that shit in my life.
Next time on Game Grumps, do you want to keep going with this?
Let’s save it.
Just in case.
See you again.
Thank you so much for watching, and I’ll see you in the next video.