The Completionist is our guest on the show, where the show’s name is Guest Grumps!
Welcome to Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?
I do.
Starring our buddy Jirari.
Hey everyone, I’m back. I haven’t left yet. I’m still here.
So we decided we- we tried the fast trivia with this last time.
Yeah.
And we were doing okay, um, but we figured what if we had another human being with us to help us?
One with different knowledge than ours.
God, guys, I’m not that great at general trivia.
Here we go!
Here we go, this is gonna be bad.
This logo sucks, by the way.
Who wants to be a millionaire? Who wants to be a-
I like it.
Well, you know what? Fine. I guess it’s great then.
It’s my favorite logo!
So we’re going solo.
And if you don’t like it, we have a problem.
Should we do normal? Yeah.
Uh, with timer.
This is a countdown in the game. I feel like you have- it’s classic, right?
Yeah, you gotta have the pressure, right? Gotta have the pressure on.
Oh my god, they added superheroes, DC comics?
So what are we turning off?
Uh…
Ooh, we can turn things off, okay.
Yeah.
I know nothing about soccer.
And does.
Yeah, I can help you with that.
Uh… Disney I know.
Science I know shit about.
I feel like- yeah, I feel like science could go off. None of- go off, King.
Nobody here is particularly prolific in science.
Geography, no. Science, geography I’m not great at.
Yeah.
Uh…
Lifestyle?
I’m not a 40-something mom.
Yeah, definitely not.
Not yet.
Never too late.
History, probably. There’s just so much of it.
There’s been so much time and stuff.
Is language like- Language?
Is it like knowing different languages or is it like the English language of like pronouns, nouns, verbs, adverbs kind of stuff?
I don’t know.
Let’s find out.
Yeah, it works.
Oh, that’s right. We get to choose a character.
Choose our character.
Chun Hang Nadia.
Jorge.
I like that Jorge is just going casual.
I like that Jorge is spelled like multiple Georges.
Yeah.
I’m- I’m Georges.
Julie?
Not just one.
Massimo.
I like Massimo.
I like Massimo.
He’s a CEO, but doesn’t say of what.
No.
In his passion is cars, which means he buys a bunch of cars.
He’s the CEO of getting down.
Bad mustache? Hell yeah.
CEO of eating. Okay.
He’s part of the cars everyday order.
That’s the CEO. That’s what it stands for.
Cash. Exciting.
That kind of looks like what when when those circles are intertwining Aaron it kind of looks like the biblical angel.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Biblically accurate.
Biblically accurate angel.
It’s gonna take your soul.
Be not afraid.
Shit.
Oh.
Oh.
This guy’s the worst.
What?
Uh, can you lean into the mic sir?
Yeah.
Doing a great job hosting.
What was your name?
I didn’t catch your name.
They’re actually real character models in the audience.
That’s kind of impressive.
Like a boss.
Oh.
Like a boss.
I regret picking Massimo.
Well you know the money ladder.
You know the money ladder.
On this show we’ve never gotten a million dollars.
No.
How close have you gotten?
Fairly close.
Yeah we were pretty close last time.
I think we got to like 32,000 maybe 64.
It was higher than that wasn’t it?
I don’t think so.
It gets real tough.
Luckily we have the smartest man alive, Gerard.
I feel bad titling that.
Don’t say that.
I feel bad titling that episode.
Did Dan hit the million?
Color wasabi.
Plant that in the form of paste is mainly used as a condiment.
This is pretty easy.
Yeah.
Shit.
Green.
I wish it was blue.
What?
It’s green.
Is it green?
Yeah.
And let’s go for.
Let’s go.
Sorry everybody who’s British at home.
Let’s go.
He’s like.
Oh.
That’s my final answer.
Damn he’s very British.
That’s not even like surface level British.
That’s like fucking.
Final answer.
That’s some drilling oil British right there.
Top tier Brit action.
I believed it to the end.
I did a good job.
I’m a good boy.
My mother says we are great friends.
Something which is as good as new.
What?
It’s the old chervil situation.
Parsley position?
What the fuck?
Tarragon state.
Oh mint condition.
Got it yeah.
They do that thing where it’s like.
Cute versions.
Parsley position sounds like a sex position that doesn’t sound very exciting.
Oh whoops I have to.
It’s time to spice things up.
You want to try the parsley position?
Nope.
I’m good.
I’m hard pass.
Nope.
That just makes it look fancier than it is.
Yeah exactly.
Yeah.
I hope it is the right one.
Is that parsley on the bed?
Why are you being so dramatic about this one?
Even on the show fucking when Regis was doing this shit.
That’s the one.
Yeah that’s it.
It’s obvious yeah.
Next question.
Let’s go for a whole new question.
What?
Biathletes?
Oh is it a rod?
What the fuck is this?
Biathletes?
I’m assuming it’s a bow.
Or maybe a rifle?
Ah shit.
A bow seems like the right answer.
Water gun is bizarre.
Yeah it depends what that second athletic event is.
Try a bow.
A bow let’s.
There’s no way they run and then they fish.
Well no it’s either B or C.
Yes that’s my final answer.
Well it is your final answer because you’re going home.
Yeah.
You have given your final answer.
Correct.
Take your time telling us your final answer please.
I told you.
Yeah.
It’s the end for you.
Alright we did it.
Guys thanks for watching.
Appreciate it.
Earnings.
Zero.
Aaron let’s do the quick version.
The rest is just a bunch of waiting around for him to say stuff.
It’s the drama dude.
The drama sucks.
What’s wrong with you?
Drama’s fantastic.
Um I’m sorry do I not have 978,000 neurons?
They gave it to us for free because they were tired of us not using the DLC.
I love that.
They were like two people afforded the DLC.
We need to just give it to them now.
Alright I get it.
Alright here we go.
So now we’ve eliminated the host.
We’re just doing this.
Commissioner Gordon.
Commissioner Gordon.
Hell yeah.
Okay.
Yay.
Sick.
Which of the following is not a recognized boxing weight?
Oh here you go Aaron.
I have no idea.
Mosquito weight.
Mosquito weight doesn’t sound real.
Yeah.
In the manga Berserk what band did Griffith found?
The Band of the Hawk.
Nice.
Oh thank god I don’t know enough about manga.
The Burr of the Cirque.
Greek athlete was the first champion of Marathon in 1896.
Pythagoras.
No.
Spyridon Lewis.
Nikos Alikas.
Boy these all sound pretty Greek.
Should we do a lifeline?
We got 15 seconds.
Yeah real quick.
Ask the audience.
They really like Spyridon.
Spyridon Lewis.
How did they know?
Hell yeah.
Yeah.
Oh good old Spyridon.
Currency is in New Zealand.
It’s the dollar right?
Does anything that a Spyron do.
Yeah.
Well done.
Is it really?
Yeah well it’s the New Zealand dollar.
Oh the New Zealand dollar.
Gotcha gotcha.
Kodak camera.
George Kodak.
Oh dude.
George Eastman.
Wow.
George Eastman sounds like.
George Eastman does sound bright for some reason.
That sounds the most normal out of these three.
Oh.
Well done.
Well done.
Yeah yeah yeah.
I guess it is quick mode so there’s not.
I’m talking that was the Bee Gees.
Yeah.
The Bee Gees.
The Bee Gees makes sense out of all of those answers.
If you’re going to ask me 1975 music questions I’ll hang out.
What’s the name of Simba in the Prag on the Lion’s Guard?
What the fuck?
I did not watch the Lion’s Guard.
Is that the sequel?
Like the direct to DVD?
I’ve seen Lion King two and a half.
I thought it was like one and a half.
Yeah.
Two.
Phone a friend.
I’m going to phone Andy.
It’s A.
Okay.
Keon.
Wow.
That was a full on shot in the dark.
My friend’s a huge Lion King fan.
Gotcha.
Which alphabetically named pop group had a top 20 hit in 1983 with The Look of Love?
Oh boy.
What?
I don’t know.
There are none of these bands are real.
Alphabetically named pop group had a top 20.
Try L.M.N.O.P.
That’s a pretty fun name.
Boo.
It was ABC.
Duh.
Duh.
Remember them?
Well, there was another band called ABC, Another Bad Creation, in the 90s, so I figured maybe
not.
But were they ABC or were they Another Bad Creation?
They were called ABC.
Do you remember Boys to Men, ABC, BBD?
You’re just saying.
No.
It was the collaboration between Boys to Men, Another Bad Creation, and Bill Bivdevoe.
Oh man.
My inhaler.
Somebody call the hospital.
Sounds like you’re saying B then D because you can’t decide the answer.
Here we go.
We’re going to get past 10,000 this time.
In which of these sports is a successful touchdown to the score?
I’m going to say football.
Badminton.
Final answer.
That’s a bad answer.
Bad answer.
Digital currency in 2009.
That’s Bitcoin.
Bitcoin.
Web notes.
Yeah, Bitcoin.
Bitcoin.
App cash.
I hear it’s making a comeback.
Aquanab’s father.
Ooh.
Aquanab’s father?
If I had to guess Tom Curry because Tom Petty, Tim Curry, and Tim Robbins are celebrities.
Good call.
All right.
Nice.
Well done.
What a dumb name.
My name is given to a small subsidiary railway line.
I mean, it’s a dumb name for a comic book character.
Usually they’re like, they’re like, Frankie, Fitz, you know, it’s like alliteration or
something.
I believe it’s a branch line.
Branch line?
I think.
Okay.
Yeah.
What other series from the Star Trek saga, Star Trek Picard, recounts the continuation
of the adventures of Jean-Luc Picard?
What are those series?
Other series from the Star Trek saga, Star Trek Picard, recounts the continuation of
the adventures of Jean-Luc Picard.
It wouldn’t be Next Generation because that’s the beginning of his adventures.
Right?
Yes.
Deep Space Nine didn’t have them.
Enterprise was the original, right?
No, Enterprise was the sequel.
No, I think it would be Enterprise or Discovery.
Because those are the ones I didn’t watch.
Star Trek is not my foray.
I don’t know enough about Star Trek other than Deep Space Nine, but it’s because I know
Terry Farrell plays Dax.
She’s amazing.
On a coin flip, I’d go Enterprise.
I would say Enterprise as well.
That seems right to me, but- But he’s in the Next Generation.
I’m just going to go Next Generation, right?
Yeah, go for it.
Go for it.
It’s confusingly worded.
Because Enterprise is the ship, right?
It’s not a series.
Well, I think they made a series out of it.
No, Enterprise is a series, yes.
Did you choose it?
Star Trek Enterprise is real.
No.
I trust you, Aaron.
Next Generation.
Yeah, go right ahead.
All right.
That was a good call.
I think you were right.
It was poorly worded.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They should have just said, what’s the other word he’s in?
The function was reunified in October 3rd, 1990.
I believe, boy, it’s tough because they broke up again.
Oh, no, Germany.
Sorry.
Germany.
What am I saying?
German.
Oh, yeah.
There are many germs.
Father Emilio Estevez.
That would be Martin Sheen.
Martin Sheen, yep.
Estevez.
Oh, that’d be hockey.
Yeah.
What?
Iced hockey.
Iced hockey.
I’ll have one iced hockey, please.
The Gumball 3000.
If I know this correct, the Gumball race, I think it’s a car race.
I’ll take the L on this if it isn’t, but I think it’s a car race.
We could ask a friend.
We all take the L. Let’s ask a friend.
I think it’s a car.
I feel like Pierre, our cousin, might know.
Car.
Nice.
Yeah.
Nice.
Well done.
I thought they raced Gumballs.
Crystals that are used to…
Kyber crystals.
Kyber crystals.
Yeah.
You’ve come to the right, folks.
We’re at 32,000.
Hell yeah.
Climbing.
Yup.
Longest running game show host, 2017.
Oh, man.
Ooh.
2017.
That’s tough.
Dude, it’s either Pat Sajak or Alex Trebek.
Alex Trebek was still going up until he passed recently.
Bob Barker was Price is Right for a long time, too.
Yeah, but they switched hosts a long time ago.
Can we eliminate answers?
We know it’s not Bob Barker.
It’s not Bob Barker, and it’s not Howie Mandel.
It has to be Pat Sajak or Alex Trebek.
Yeah.
This would be a good one to 50-50, because maybe it’ll get rid of one of those options.
I think they’re gonna do the jerk.
No, they’re gonna get rid of C&D.
They’re gonna get rid of the bottom two.
You know they will.
Yeah, they’re gonna totally do that.
Okay.
Maybe ask the audience?
Well, who’s the host of Wheel of Fortune now?
Pat Sajak.
Yeah, he’s still there.
He has not stopped.
Alex Trebek is not the host.
Right, but you don’t get credit for anything after 2017.
He was Jeopardy.
Longest-running…
Yeah.
Oh, so why would it be 2017?
That’s like when they’re asking the question.
That’s when they were asking the question.
Maybe…
Like, as of 2017.
As of 2017, he’s…
Okay, so Alex Trebek was replaced in 2017.
No, he was replaced actually in 2020, 2021, before he passed.
Alright, let’s vote amongst us.
Who thinks Pat Sajak, Wheel of Fortune?
Wheel of Fortune started in, like, 82, I think.
What about Jeopardy?
I don’t know.
Oh, God.
I was hoping someone else knew.
I know.
Jeopardy feels like an 80s thing.
Well, here’s the thing.
Here’s the thing.
Alex Trebek hosted other shows besides Jeopardy.
Yeah, but did Pat Sajak is the question?
I like to imagine that, in the reality of this world, we’re all one person talking to
himself endlessly, saying out loud everything everybody says.
I think it’s this, actually.
It’s how my brain works.
Yeah.
I’m gonna say Pat.
Alright.
Alright, let’s do it.
Fuck!
Oh, fuck.
That was a good question.
132, though.
Would it be cool if we 50-50’d that?
Shame someone didn’t suggest it.
You gotta save that for the taller ones.
The taller ones.
I think Arin’s right.
It would have taken on the bottom, too.
It absolutely would.
Maybe.
You know it.
You know that’s what would have happened.
I don’t know that.
That’s happened so many times to us.
I want to save it for the hard ones that we definitely got to.
So my dad doesn’t watch movies ever, but he watched one movie he’s obsessed with and it’s
Slumdog Millionaire.
Never seen it.
It’s because he understands who wants to be a millionaire.
It’s the one movie he’s always like, oh I love that movie, it’s my favorite.
My favorite movie is Slumdog Millionaire.
That’s awesome.
What do you say you hit when you go to bed?
The sack.
Hit the sack.
The jackpot.
That’s what I say.
I’m gonna hit the rug.
Fucking lay down and I’m like, jackpot!
Hey, Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure.
Actually exists.
Oh man, I don’t fucking watch Jojo.
I don’t either, shit!
Think it’s this one.
Oh man.
Nicely done.
Thank god.
This is a cobbler mint for a living.
Shoes.
Computers!
Computers!
Bones.
I make bones.
Which of these signs appears on a standard Monopoly board?
Free parking.
Which of these signs?
Okay.
Right?
Yeah.
Bus stop?
No waiting?
What?
I was, I was, I was confused as to whether it was in the affirmative or the negative.
Yes.
Vampires.
But there are werewolves in it, aren’t there?
Buffy the Bummy Slayer.
The alliteration’s better on that one.
I do like it.
Buffy the Mummy.
Which of these creatures is a crustacean?
Uh, Prawn.
Prawn.
Prawn, yeah.
Poom.
Prawns.
Who did the title of the 1980s game directed by Danny Sir-
Throw Momma from the Train.
Why would you do that?
I don’t know, maybe she was giving you backchat.
The wire takes place, I wanna say, shhh.
It’s in Baltimore.
Baltimore?
Yep.
It’s in Baltimore, because I was gonna say Chicago.
Murder more, baby.
Anthony Hopkins?
Oh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
That’s my head exploding.
It’s not Reagan.
Can’t be Reagan, right?
That’s ridiculous.
Reagan could just play Reagan.
Why would you make a movie about Reagan?
Reagan could just play Reagan.
Right?
Um.
Are you looking it up?
No, no, he’s writing a text.
Um.
I would say Nixon, maybe?
Yeah, that sounds right.
I don’t know.
I feel like everyone played, everyone either played, the problem is that Kennedy, Lincoln,
and Nixon have had so many movies made about them.
Right.
I feel like they’d choose a handsomer actor for Kennedy, and Lincoln, I think, is just
meant to throw it, because Daniel Day Lewis did it.
Yeah, but he didn’t do that until way later.
That’s true.
Should we maybe use one of our lifelines, or is it too early?
Cool with me.
I’ve got to fucking say to the audience, D.
Ronald Reagan?
Really?
Are you serious?
Are you serious?
We were way wrong.
Motherfuckers!
We know, you assholes!
Oh, you.
Wow.
The audience fucked us.
That’s so fucked up.
That’s so fucked up.
That’s so fucked up.
Why would you even guess that?
Is there a movie about Reagan at all?
That’s what I’m saying, that’s the least, damn.
We had it right, too.
Yeah.
We had it in our bones, man.
That’s okay.
This is a learning experience.
We followed the mob.
That’s what you get for listening to the fans.
People at home.
The mob mentality.
Yeah, you’ve got to follow your own heart.
You don’t want to make content for other people.
You make it for yourself.
Macchi?
What type of restaurant do you order macchi?
Definitely not a Lebanese restaurant.
I would have known that.
You could do it in an Italian restaurant, but you won’t meet with limited success.
The term is not associated with poker.
Checkmate.
Checkmate.
Checkmate.
Not when I play.
Checkmate, motherfuckers.
Bust.
Kentucky, right?
Yeah.
God help you if you get that Kansas friend.
Knights.
Fuck.
Boba Fett was born on Camino.
Well done.
Yeah.
Good job, Arin.
These words can mean fate or destiny.
Kismet.
Kibbutz.
Kitch.
At least I got the theme song.
That’s hype.
It’s kitschy in here.
Yeah.
I respect it.
Superman Lives was supposed to be released in 1997 by Tim Burton.
Cantos was.
Oh, I know this.
Oh, this was the cage.
No kidding.
Yeah.
I know that.
There’s pictures of the suit that I was going to wear.
It’s insane.
It’s wild.
Euphrates River is in which continent?
That is, isn’t that in Egypt?
Yeah, I think so.
So that would be Africa.
Oh.
Is Egypt in Asia?
No.
Wait, am I wrong?
Hold on.
This is totally in Africa.
Euphrates River?
Euphrates Nuts, dude.
Nice.
Got him.
Euphrates Nuts.
Shut up.
This sucks.
This sucks so bad.
It sucks, but you know, someone out there was like, I laughed.
Yeah.
Yeah, you know what?
It is one of those, like, in the category of Deez Nuts jokes.
It feels pretty good.
There are people that just like them all.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Wow.
Originating in Turkey, the Euphrates River flows through Syria and Iraq.
So it’s basically many countries except Egypt.
Okay.
Dope.
What’s the one in Egypt?
I thought the Tigris and the Euphrates were in Egypt, but it’s been a long time since
I’ve learned these things.
Run of the mill.
Run of the mill.
Which one is the guessing game I’ll have to play by family to do on a show?
I spy.
I spy.
I spy.
Not in the game of Judas.
They’re all just synonyms of I spy.
What is this TV game show that’s mostly based on the game of Hangman?
Oh.
It’s Wheel of Fortune.
I mean, it’s.
Oh, the Nile is the river in Egypt.
It’s not a part of boxing.
Der.
B-wait?
Yeah, B-wait.
I’m coming in at B-wait.
Buzz, buzz, buzz.
Buzz, buzz, buzz.
Flip like a butterfly.
Which of the following are a pair?
Chippendale. Yeah. Wedge and wood? You don’t like Hepple and White?
Hepple and White? Bill and Morris?
Oh, that Hepple. Oh, he’s getting white into trouble.
It’s like a 20’s show that your great grandma would be like, I love that show.
Turn it on the radio, it’s time for Hepple and White.
Salome and Alpine Skiing.
Slalom. Red and Blue. I can’t read.
The colors of the poles.
Dumbo holding his trunk to give him confidence to fly.
A feather. He has dick.
Tales from the Loop is a television series, but what inspired it?
Tales from the Loop? Oh, it was um…
Tales from the Loop?
It’s, it’s, it was a bunch of drawings, wasn’t it?
I don’t know.
Should we use one of our lifelines?
I’m gonna say a role-playing game.
Alright, go for it. We just started, so.
Yeah, fuck it.
Wait, go away.
Yeah, look at you. You know what’s up.
You’re the man.
Uh, Divine Miss M.
Oh, we had this question before. It’s Bette Midler.
That makes sense.
Yeah, she is divine.
Yeah, you bet.
Alright, one American won three titles in track and field.
Oh, dear.
Camelita.
Carmelita.
Carmelita. Sounds delicious on my ice cream.
50-50.
Oh, dear.
I don’t know.
I’m gonna go with Carmel.
Nice.
God damn it. Fucking sucks.
You gotta make it to the million, dog.
Alright, one more time.
Dude, our trivia is terrible.
We’re not great.
Let’s get it. Let’s get that gamer bread.
Ali, if you know any of these, feel free to chime in and save us.
Yeah, just shout it out.
I mean, no pressure.
No pressure.
You can tell us, hey, don’t do that answer.
Now that we know the audience is a bunch of fucking liars.
I can’t believe we waited.
That was the worst one to go out on.
Um, a ball.
You do need a ball.
Shellcock seems like the appropriate answer.
A ball.
Which of these is a North American term for the English called dustbin?
Trash can.
Would you throw this in the rubbish bottle?
What about the waste chest?
Strong smell. Stench.
What the fuck?
The wench on the bench was drenched in stench.
Remember the thing that was called a papoose?
What?
What member of our family is called a papoose?
I thought the papoose was the thing that carries the baby.
Maybe it’s just the baby.
Maybe it’s just the baby.
Popcorn is usually made from which grain?
Corn.
Maize.
Nice.
Do we call it maize?
Dude, you never saw those stories-
I know it’s the ancient name is maize.
You never saw those stories about Native Americans
around the TV eating a big ol’ bowl of popcorn?
Classic.
Which of these plural nouns is the only one
that has a singular noun form?
Uh,
greeting.
Season greetings.
Thank.
Yeah, greeting.
Yeah, you don’t just get one measles.
Thank God.
Type of explosive?
Uh,
Cordite would be my guess.
Okay, sweet.
It sounds like a-
Independent state of Brunei
performs part of which island?
Oh, man.
Let’s ask someone.
I thought we got rid of geography.
Yeah, what the fuck?
Uh, Vanessa.
She says it’s Borneo.
Thank you, Vanessa.
This is so fucking smart, dude.
You’re better than the audience.
Punga.
Damn.
Can’t be Japan.
It sounds New Zealand-y.
Okay.
Good one, Dan.
I’m sweating.
Machu Picchu.
That was the Inca…
That’s…
You said it was so much authority right
until the end.
That was the Inca?
Inca Colas from Peru. Machu Picchu is in Peru.
Smart.
What series is that from the books of the
vanilla saga written by Luke Jennings?
I don’t know.
The series is adapted from the books.
Villanelle?
The Villanelle saga?
Let’s ask. Let’s ask someone.
I want to say 13… I was gonna ask my aunt.
13 reasons why makes the
most sense, but I don’t…
Oh, crap. Oh, fuck.
Yeah. Alright, there we go.
Alright, 43% here. 64.
How many property spaces
can be built upon? 22, baby.
Is that true? Mm-hmm.
We worked it out. That’s right.
Italian Fashion House
started life as a Saturday shop
in Florence in 1906.
Fuck. Great question. What’s a
saddlery shop? Like a
saddle shop? For, like, sandals?
Really? For sandals.
Sandals or saddles? I mean, like a horse.
Damn. All we have is the
50… What is this?
Is it like a reshuffle of the
question? Oh, try it.
Another question? Oh, yes. Oh, awesome.
Which of these Hollywood actresses gave birth to
her second son in the fall of 2008?
Shit, I don’t know.
Does Jillian Anders even have kids?
Okay, 2008. Kirsten Dunst was in Spider-Man
around that time, so probably not her.
Drew Barrymore has two
kids. I want to
say it’s Debra Messing or
Jillian Anderson, but…
Can we
50-50 it too?
Yeah, we can. Alright, let’s just do it. We got nothing
to lose. Oh, damn.
Let’s try Jillian Anderson.
Yeah!
That makes sense. 250 gray!
John Constantine is from
what city?
Oh, man. The
comic guy? I meant to say
250 grand and 250 K
at the same time, and it came out 250
gay, so I just would like to
apologize.
I forgive you. Thank you.
You’re not 100% gay. You’re 250%
gay. That’s…
250,000%
gay.
Who’s John Constantine?
She’s… Keanu Reeves.
Oh, that Constantine?
Yeah.
Okay. It’s a comic book character.
But if that’s the…
So, Blackpool,
Liverpool, and Manchester are all
cities from the UK, right?
From Europe? I think they all are.
Is Lancaster as well?
Well, there is a Lancaster here, but…
That’s why I’m like… Yeah, he’s from
Lancaster, California. I don’t know, man!
I don’t know this shit! Could be Lancaster,
Pennsylvania. Yeah, where the fanciest restaurant
there is Red Lobster. Oh, man.
I think it’s time to take a wild
swing. Oh, man.
I feel like Liverpool.
Because Manchester’s kind of like a…
I don’t know, man.
Fuck.
Blackpool sounds like it makes the most sense
because it’s all gothic and shit.
It’s dark, yeah.
But maybe that’s the trick. Yeah.
I don’t know. I’m trying to trick you.
Close your eyes and push a button. Do you know the answer,
Allie?
They’re all British.
Yeah, I don’t know.
Allie, pick one so we can
blame you for the answer.
Manchester. She says Manchester.
What do you think? You would go against
Allie?
I guess it’s just because I’ve been to
Manchester and it’s like…
It wouldn’t be a very interesting place for a
superhero to be from. How dare you say that? We’ve done
wonderful shows in Manchester.
The Great City of…
I was gonna say Liverpool!
Fuck!
Alright. One more time.
One more run. Let’s do it.
Speed run. Speed run. Here we go.
Speed run the trivia. Last chance.
Okay. We got this.
We got this.
We will be the millionaire. Really could use a
soccer question. Also, by the
way, I’ll just say
last time we played this,
I said that
Bayern Munich,
the team was called Bayern because
it had been bought by Bayer,
the drug company.
I was confusing it with Bayer Leverkusen.
Bayern is actually
German for Bavaria.
I’m glad you cleared that up, man. Well, I’m glad
that I got 8,000 messages
about it, so I got them.
My respect.
I think it’s Pinocchio.
Let it go!
Prime Minister.
Justin Trudeau, sir.
Canadian Donald Trump.
Miss Piggy!
Ms. Puppy.
Miss Caddy.
That’s what they call
me around the office.
Country singer.
Bob Geldof.
He’s from Ireland.
Okay.
He played
Pink in The Wall,
the Pink Floyd movie.
Yeah, he’s good.
He’s got an awful relationship.
Dear John.
Really? Yeah.
I guess that’s not really a term people use anymore,
but I remember it from the 80s.
Who’s John?
I don’t know. How many direct-to-video sequels
to Cinderella have been released?
I think it’s three.
Three sounds right.
Well, no, because if it’s the first one…
Because I think there’s three Cinderella’s,
so that means there’s two sequels.
I agree, so it’s B.
Nicely worked out, guys.
This sport was the
Bosman…
This is all you, Dan.
I’ve never heard of this.
Bosman?
I don’t know.
I would guess
either boxing or tennis.
Oh, a wall of football.
Football it is. What the hell is the
Bosman ruling?
We made it to 250,000.
One more. That was too short.
Oh, shit. Alright.
Dance in charge. We’re just here.
We gotta make a run at it, at least.
Whatever you want.
I got nothing going on, so I’m on your guys’ side today.
Fucking
King Avedan over here.
Oh.
What?
They meant soccer football.
Ah.
Futhbol.
The Bosman ruling.
You should know that. You love soccer football.
I do love soccer football, but I don’t know
the story of it. It’s by the character of the Flash.
Uh, Hermes. Yeah.
Hermes is fast.
Informal term in a
casino slot machine.
What the fuck?
Informal term. One-armed bandit.
Wow, that’s funny.
I’ve never heard that. It made the most sense, right?
Yeah. That was
Russia.
Rusia.
Ruska.
A chancel. Chancel is a feature
of what kind of building? Fucking, what the hell
is this shit? Is this like the first three questions?
Chances.
Church.
Wow, Arin. Because I figure it’s
a chancelor. Flora and fauna
is the Latin term meaning of what?
Plants and animals. Yeah.
I learned that from
Metal Gear Solid.
Cool.
The flora and fauna out there. Eat it, school. Call me if you have
any questions.
Which of these games uses a board with rooms and a house
marked on it?
Clue?
Nice. Yeah, the
questions, it’s like, yeah, you’re like, wait.
The phrase fat Freddy’s
frog is an example of what?
That’s alliteration, baby. Alliteration.
Is it the paradox
because frogs, uh,
Freddy’s frog is not fat?
Alfredo Linguini’s part of the issue. I’m gonna say that’s probably
cars. Oh, damn.
There’s someone probably named
Linguini in the second,
one of the Italian cars.
Paper money. I don’t know, but I’m interested
to find out.
I want to say China.
Really? Wait.
Because I, you know,
it’s the fucking,
uh,
fuck.
The, what the, the, the
Phoenicians.
Do you remember in Epcot when you go on the thing
and he’s like pounding the papyrus
and he’s like,
and they’re like, thank the Phoenicians,
they invented it. You know what I
mean? But it’s not even on here, so.
Where the Phoenicians are from. I know, exactly.
Uh. We should probably use
the lifeline. Oh, man.
Which one? We’re eight questions in, it’s not too bad.
What’s the, the answer lifeline?
Oh, for fuck’s sake, China.
Yeah, good job. You were right, you were right.
Which of these is a
seabird? A snipe, right?
I don’t know. No.
Swallow is not a seabird.
No, it’s not.
Scua is funny.
A snipe.
A snipe is like a,
it’s like a, it’s like a swamp
bird, isn’t it? I don’t know, he’s from
Ravenclaw. I mean, uh,
Slytherin.
Snipe. Is ever a snipe?
Um.
That is how you say it in a British accent.
Ah, yes, it’s ever a snipe.
Oh, the swamp bird, the
snipe.
Scua sounds funny. That just sounds
like the sea. It’s, it’s, yeah,
it’s like Barracuda, scua, like it feels
like it should be underwater.
Scuba.
What do you say?
Scua?
Snipe?
I don’t know. Yeah, I don’t know.
Alley pick for us.
Snipe or scua for a seabird?
Scua.
Yeah boy!
Alley is just throwing up the peace sign.
Hell yeah.
Alright.
Which Star Wars movie did John Williams not
compose the original soundtrack?
Um, assuming that would be
Rogue One. Or Solo.
Ooh, definitely
Revenge of the Sith and Rise of Skywalker.
Can we get rid of two?
Yeah. It’s
probably gonna get rid of
it. Son of a bitch.
It’s every time!
They know which ones you know.
Fuck.
They can read this, the desire sensor.
I know, right?
This is tough.
I would have thought John Williams
would have composed everything Star Wars related at this
point, but he definitely has had like Ghost
or not Ghost Riders, but like spiritual people take over
for him. I don’t want to say Rogue One.
Cause I don’t remember any
of the music.
Cause I don’t remember any of the music.
Nicely done, Arin.
He did Solo, interesting.
First name of the gamekeeper Malores
and Lady Chatterley’s lover.
Oh boy.
What?
If I had to guess, I would say Duncan, but I don’t know.
Fuck!
Oliver Malores.
Everyone knows that.
How could we have forgotten?
Duncan Malores just sounded
It sounded appropriate.
It had some nice Chatterley flow to it.
Yes.
Well guys, I’m sorry we didn’t make it to be a millionaire.
Nothing new for us, brother.
You’re just going to have to pay us the million now.
We’re going to have to get the entire office in here.
How close have you guys gotten?
I think that was the closest we’ve ever gotten.
That $250,000
was about as close as we’ve gotten.
Dang. Microids.
Elliot Graciano handles the coup.
The coup.
Well guys, thanks for having me.
Dude, this was delightful.
It was a lot of fun.
I’ve also realized I’m really bad at trivia.
It’s humbling, isn’t it?
It’s very humbling.
You can’t carry that much information.
The two things you like.
For me, it’s Magic the Gathering and
Jerking Off.
Strangely enough, they didn’t make
either one of those categories.
Jerking Off is the one I’m very surprised
was even considered to be put on the board.
Exactly. Mega Man.
If they had a Mega Man one, I could do it.
I would love it if your four
chosen categories were Arts and Literature,
Mega Man, Jerking Off,
and Magic the Gathering.
Whether you only get Arts and Literature
questions and know the other three.
In Lady Chatterley’s Lover.
Alright, we’ll see you later everybody.
Bye. Love you. Kisses and hugs.
Feel it.
Feel it through the headphones.
Be safe with it. Feel it through your phone.
Hugs and kisses.
You have like a hammerhead shark.
I gave him a little tail.
I was like…
Welcome to Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?Who Wants to be a Millionaire SPEEDRUN?
The Completionist is our guest on the show, where the show’s name is Guest Grumps!
Welcome to Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?
I do.
Starring our buddy Jirari.
Hey everyone, I’m back. I haven’t left yet. I’m still here.
So we decided we- we tried the fast trivia with this last time.
Yeah.
And we were doing okay, um, but we figured what if we had another human being with us to help us?
One with different knowledge than ours.
God, guys, I’m not that great at general trivia.
Here we go!
Here we go, this is gonna be bad.
This logo sucks, by the way.
Who wants to be a millionaire? Who wants to be a-
I like it.
Well, you know what? Fine. I guess it’s great then.
It’s my favorite logo!
So we’re going solo.
And if you don’t like it, we have a problem.
Should we do normal? Yeah.
Uh, with timer.
This is a countdown in the game. I feel like you have- it’s classic, right?
Yeah, you gotta have the pressure, right? Gotta have the pressure on.
Oh my god, they added superheroes, DC comics?
So what are we turning off?
Uh…
Ooh, we can turn things off, okay.
Yeah.
I know nothing about soccer.
And does.
Yeah, I can help you with that.
Uh… Disney I know.
Science I know shit about.
I feel like- yeah, I feel like science could go off. None of- go off, King.
Nobody here is particularly prolific in science.
Geography, no. Science, geography I’m not great at.
Yeah.
Uh…
Lifestyle?
I’m not a 40-something mom.
Yeah, definitely not.
Not yet.
Never too late.
History, probably. There’s just so much of it.
There’s been so much time and stuff.
Is language like- Language?
Is it like knowing different languages or is it like the English language of like pronouns, nouns, verbs, adverbs kind of stuff?
I don’t know.
Let’s find out.
Yeah, it works.
Oh, that’s right. We get to choose a character.
Choose our character.
Chun Hang Nadia.
Jorge.
I like that Jorge is just going casual.
I like that Jorge is spelled like multiple Georges.
Yeah.
I’m- I’m Georges.
Julie?
Not just one.
Massimo.
I like Massimo.
I like Massimo.
He’s a CEO, but doesn’t say of what.
No.
In his passion is cars, which means he buys a bunch of cars.
He’s the CEO of getting down.
Bad mustache? Hell yeah.
CEO of eating. Okay.
He’s part of the cars everyday order.
That’s the CEO. That’s what it stands for.
Cash. Exciting.
That kind of looks like what when when those circles are intertwining Aaron it kind of looks like the biblical angel.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Biblically accurate.
Biblically accurate angel.
It’s gonna take your soul.
Be not afraid.
Shit.
Oh.
Oh.
This guy’s the worst.
What?
Uh, can you lean into the mic sir?
Yeah.
Doing a great job hosting.
What was your name?
I didn’t catch your name.
They’re actually real character models in the audience.
That’s kind of impressive.
Like a boss.
Oh.
Like a boss.
I regret picking Massimo.
Well you know the money ladder.
You know the money ladder.
On this show we’ve never gotten a million dollars.
No.
How close have you gotten?
Fairly close.
Yeah we were pretty close last time.
I think we got to like 32,000 maybe 64.
It was higher than that wasn’t it?
I don’t think so.
It gets real tough.
Luckily we have the smartest man alive, Gerard.
I feel bad titling that.
Don’t say that.
I feel bad titling that episode.
Did Dan hit the million?
Color wasabi.
Plant that in the form of paste is mainly used as a condiment.
This is pretty easy.
Yeah.
Shit.
Green.
I wish it was blue.
What?
It’s green.
Is it green?
Yeah.
And let’s go for.
Let’s go.
Sorry everybody who’s British at home.
Let’s go.
He’s like.
Oh.
That’s my final answer.
Damn he’s very British.
That’s not even like surface level British.
That’s like fucking.
Final answer.
That’s some drilling oil British right there.
Top tier Brit action.
I believed it to the end.
I did a good job.
I’m a good boy.
My mother says we are great friends.
Something which is as good as new.
What?
It’s the old chervil situation.
Parsley position?
What the fuck?
Tarragon state.
Oh mint condition.
Got it yeah.
They do that thing where it’s like.
Cute versions.
Parsley position sounds like a sex position that doesn’t sound very exciting.
Oh whoops I have to.
It’s time to spice things up.
You want to try the parsley position?
Nope.
I’m good.
I’m hard pass.
Nope.
That just makes it look fancier than it is.
Yeah exactly.
Yeah.
I hope it is the right one.
Is that parsley on the bed?
Why are you being so dramatic about this one?
Even on the show fucking when Regis was doing this shit.
That’s the one.
Yeah that’s it.
It’s obvious yeah.
Next question.
Let’s go for a whole new question.
What?
Biathletes?
Oh is it a rod?
What the fuck is this?
Biathletes?
I’m assuming it’s a bow.
Or maybe a rifle?
Ah shit.
A bow seems like the right answer.
Water gun is bizarre.
Yeah it depends what that second athletic event is.
Try a bow.
A bow let’s.
There’s no way they run and then they fish.
Well no it’s either B or C.
Yes that’s my final answer.
Well it is your final answer because you’re going home.
Yeah.
You have given your final answer.
Correct.
Take your time telling us your final answer please.
I told you.
Yeah.
It’s the end for you.
Alright we did it.
Guys thanks for watching.
Appreciate it.
Earnings.
Zero.
Aaron let’s do the quick version.
The rest is just a bunch of waiting around for him to say stuff.
It’s the drama dude.
The drama sucks.
What’s wrong with you?
Drama’s fantastic.
Um I’m sorry do I not have 978,000 neurons?
They gave it to us for free because they were tired of us not using the DLC.
I love that.
They were like two people afforded the DLC.
We need to just give it to them now.
Alright I get it.
Alright here we go.
So now we’ve eliminated the host.
We’re just doing this.
Commissioner Gordon.
Commissioner Gordon.
Hell yeah.
Okay.
Yay.
Sick.
Which of the following is not a recognized boxing weight?
Oh here you go Aaron.
I have no idea.
Mosquito weight.
Mosquito weight doesn’t sound real.
Yeah.
In the manga Berserk what band did Griffith found?
The Band of the Hawk.
Nice.
Oh thank god I don’t know enough about manga.
The Burr of the Cirque.
Greek athlete was the first champion of Marathon in 1896.
Pythagoras.
No.
Spyridon Lewis.
Nikos Alikas.
Boy these all sound pretty Greek.
Should we do a lifeline?
We got 15 seconds.
Yeah real quick.
Ask the audience.
They really like Spyridon.
Spyridon Lewis.
How did they know?
Hell yeah.
Yeah.
Oh good old Spyridon.
Currency is in New Zealand.
It’s the dollar right?
Does anything that a Spyron do.
Yeah.
Well done.
Is it really?
Yeah well it’s the New Zealand dollar.
Oh the New Zealand dollar.
Gotcha gotcha.
Kodak camera.
George Kodak.
Oh dude.
George Eastman.
Wow.
George Eastman sounds like.
George Eastman does sound bright for some reason.
That sounds the most normal out of these three.
Oh.
Well done.
Well done.
Yeah yeah yeah.
I guess it is quick mode so there’s not.
I’m talking that was the Bee Gees.
Yeah.
The Bee Gees.
The Bee Gees makes sense out of all of those answers.
If you’re going to ask me 1975 music questions I’ll hang out.
What’s the name of Simba in the Prag on the Lion’s Guard?
What the fuck?
I did not watch the Lion’s Guard.
Is that the sequel?
Like the direct to DVD?
I’ve seen Lion King two and a half.
I thought it was like one and a half.
Yeah.
Two.
Phone a friend.
I’m going to phone Andy.
It’s A.
Okay.
Keon.
Wow.
That was a full on shot in the dark.
My friend’s a huge Lion King fan.
Gotcha.
Which alphabetically named pop group had a top 20 hit in 1983 with The Look of Love?
Oh boy.
What?
I don’t know.
There are none of these bands are real.
Alphabetically named pop group had a top 20.
Try L.M.N.O.P.
That’s a pretty fun name.
Boo.
It was ABC.
Duh.
Duh.
Remember them?
Well, there was another band called ABC, Another Bad Creation, in the 90s, so I figured maybe
not.
But were they ABC or were they Another Bad Creation?
They were called ABC.
Do you remember Boys to Men, ABC, BBD?
You’re just saying.
No.
It was the collaboration between Boys to Men, Another Bad Creation, and Bill Bivdevoe.
Oh man.
My inhaler.
Somebody call the hospital.
Sounds like you’re saying B then D because you can’t decide the answer.
Here we go.
We’re going to get past 10,000 this time.
In which of these sports is a successful touchdown to the score?
I’m going to say football.
Badminton.
Final answer.
That’s a bad answer.
Bad answer.
Digital currency in 2009.
That’s Bitcoin.
Bitcoin.
Web notes.
Yeah, Bitcoin.
Bitcoin.
App cash.
I hear it’s making a comeback.
Aquanab’s father.
Ooh.
Aquanab’s father?
If I had to guess Tom Curry because Tom Petty, Tim Curry, and Tim Robbins are celebrities.
Good call.
All right.
Nice.
Well done.
What a dumb name.
My name is given to a small subsidiary railway line.
I mean, it’s a dumb name for a comic book character.
Usually they’re like, they’re like, Frankie, Fitz, you know, it’s like alliteration or
something.
I believe it’s a branch line.
Branch line?
I think.
Okay.
Yeah.
What other series from the Star Trek saga, Star Trek Picard, recounts the continuation
of the adventures of Jean-Luc Picard?
What are those series?
Other series from the Star Trek saga, Star Trek Picard, recounts the continuation of
the adventures of Jean-Luc Picard.
It wouldn’t be Next Generation because that’s the beginning of his adventures.
Right?
Yes.
Deep Space Nine didn’t have them.
Enterprise was the original, right?
No, Enterprise was the sequel.
No, I think it would be Enterprise or Discovery.
Because those are the ones I didn’t watch.
Star Trek is not my foray.
I don’t know enough about Star Trek other than Deep Space Nine, but it’s because I know
Terry Farrell plays Dax.
She’s amazing.
On a coin flip, I’d go Enterprise.
I would say Enterprise as well.
That seems right to me, but- But he’s in the Next Generation.
I’m just going to go Next Generation, right?
Yeah, go for it.
Go for it.
It’s confusingly worded.
Because Enterprise is the ship, right?
It’s not a series.
Well, I think they made a series out of it.
No, Enterprise is a series, yes.
Did you choose it?
Star Trek Enterprise is real.
No.
I trust you, Aaron.
Next Generation.
Yeah, go right ahead.
All right.
That was a good call.
I think you were right.
It was poorly worded.
Yeah.
Yeah.
They should have just said, what’s the other word he’s in?
The function was reunified in October 3rd, 1990.
I believe, boy, it’s tough because they broke up again.
Oh, no, Germany.
Sorry.
Germany.
What am I saying?
German.
Oh, yeah.
There are many germs.
Father Emilio Estevez.
That would be Martin Sheen.
Martin Sheen, yep.
Estevez.
Oh, that’d be hockey.
Yeah.
What?
Iced hockey.
Iced hockey.
I’ll have one iced hockey, please.
The Gumball 3000.
If I know this correct, the Gumball race, I think it’s a car race.
I’ll take the L on this if it isn’t, but I think it’s a car race.
We could ask a friend.
We all take the L. Let’s ask a friend.
I think it’s a car.
I feel like Pierre, our cousin, might know.
Car.
Nice.
Yeah.
Nice.
Well done.
I thought they raced Gumballs.
Crystals that are used to…
Kyber crystals.
Kyber crystals.
Yeah.
You’ve come to the right, folks.
We’re at 32,000.
Hell yeah.
Climbing.
Yup.
Longest running game show host, 2017.
Oh, man.
Ooh.
2017.
That’s tough.
Dude, it’s either Pat Sajak or Alex Trebek.
Alex Trebek was still going up until he passed recently.
Bob Barker was Price is Right for a long time, too.
Yeah, but they switched hosts a long time ago.
Can we eliminate answers?
We know it’s not Bob Barker.
It’s not Bob Barker, and it’s not Howie Mandel.
It has to be Pat Sajak or Alex Trebek.
Yeah.
This would be a good one to 50-50, because maybe it’ll get rid of one of those options.
I think they’re gonna do the jerk.
No, they’re gonna get rid of C&D.
They’re gonna get rid of the bottom two.
You know they will.
Yeah, they’re gonna totally do that.
Okay.
Maybe ask the audience?
Well, who’s the host of Wheel of Fortune now?
Pat Sajak.
Yeah, he’s still there.
He has not stopped.
Alex Trebek is not the host.
Right, but you don’t get credit for anything after 2017.
He was Jeopardy.
Longest-running…
Yeah.
Oh, so why would it be 2017?
That’s like when they’re asking the question.
That’s when they were asking the question.
Maybe…
Like, as of 2017.
As of 2017, he’s…
Okay, so Alex Trebek was replaced in 2017.
No, he was replaced actually in 2020, 2021, before he passed.
Alright, let’s vote amongst us.
Who thinks Pat Sajak, Wheel of Fortune?
Wheel of Fortune started in, like, 82, I think.
What about Jeopardy?
I don’t know.
Oh, God.
I was hoping someone else knew.
I know.
Jeopardy feels like an 80s thing.
Well, here’s the thing.
Here’s the thing.
Alex Trebek hosted other shows besides Jeopardy.
Yeah, but did Pat Sajak is the question?
I like to imagine that, in the reality of this world, we’re all one person talking to
himself endlessly, saying out loud everything everybody says.
I think it’s this, actually.
It’s how my brain works.
Yeah.
I’m gonna say Pat.
Alright.
Alright, let’s do it.
Fuck!
Oh, fuck.
That was a good question.
132, though.
Would it be cool if we 50-50’d that?
Shame someone didn’t suggest it.
You gotta save that for the taller ones.
The taller ones.
I think Arin’s right.
It would have taken on the bottom, too.
It absolutely would.
Maybe.
You know it.
You know that’s what would have happened.
I don’t know that.
That’s happened so many times to us.
I want to save it for the hard ones that we definitely got to.
So my dad doesn’t watch movies ever, but he watched one movie he’s obsessed with and it’s
Slumdog Millionaire.
Never seen it.
It’s because he understands who wants to be a millionaire.
It’s the one movie he’s always like, oh I love that movie, it’s my favorite.
My favorite movie is Slumdog Millionaire.
That’s awesome.
What do you say you hit when you go to bed?
The sack.
Hit the sack.
The jackpot.
That’s what I say.
I’m gonna hit the rug.
Fucking lay down and I’m like, jackpot!
Hey, Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure.
Actually exists.
Oh man, I don’t fucking watch Jojo.
I don’t either, shit!
Think it’s this one.
Oh man.
Nicely done.
Thank god.
This is a cobbler mint for a living.
Shoes.
Computers!
Computers!
Bones.
I make bones.
Which of these signs appears on a standard Monopoly board?
Free parking.
Which of these signs?
Okay.
Right?
Yeah.
Bus stop?
No waiting?
What?
I was, I was, I was confused as to whether it was in the affirmative or the negative.
Yes.
Vampires.
But there are werewolves in it, aren’t there?
Buffy the Bummy Slayer.
The alliteration’s better on that one.
I do like it.
Buffy the Mummy.
Which of these creatures is a crustacean?
Uh, Prawn.
Prawn.
Prawn, yeah.
Poom.
Prawns.
Who did the title of the 1980s game directed by Danny Sir-
Throw Momma from the Train.
Why would you do that?
I don’t know, maybe she was giving you backchat.
The wire takes place, I wanna say, shhh.
It’s in Baltimore.
Baltimore?
Yep.
It’s in Baltimore, because I was gonna say Chicago.
Murder more, baby.
Anthony Hopkins?
Oh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
Uh.
That’s my head exploding.
It’s not Reagan.
Can’t be Reagan, right?
That’s ridiculous.
Reagan could just play Reagan.
Why would you make a movie about Reagan?
Reagan could just play Reagan.
Right?
Um.
Are you looking it up?
No, no, he’s writing a text.
Um.
I would say Nixon, maybe?
Yeah, that sounds right.
I don’t know.
I feel like everyone played, everyone either played, the problem is that Kennedy, Lincoln,
and Nixon have had so many movies made about them.
Right.
I feel like they’d choose a handsomer actor for Kennedy, and Lincoln, I think, is just
meant to throw it, because Daniel Day Lewis did it.
Yeah, but he didn’t do that until way later.
That’s true.
Should we maybe use one of our lifelines, or is it too early?
Cool with me.
I’ve got to fucking say to the audience, D.
Ronald Reagan?
Really?
Are you serious?
Are you serious?
We were way wrong.
Motherfuckers!
We know, you assholes!
Oh, you.
Wow.
The audience fucked us.
That’s so fucked up.
That’s so fucked up.
That’s so fucked up.
Why would you even guess that?
Is there a movie about Reagan at all?
That’s what I’m saying, that’s the least, damn.
We had it right, too.
Yeah.
We had it in our bones, man.
That’s okay.
This is a learning experience.
We followed the mob.
That’s what you get for listening to the fans.
People at home.
The mob mentality.
Yeah, you’ve got to follow your own heart.
You don’t want to make content for other people.
You make it for yourself.
Macchi?
What type of restaurant do you order macchi?
Definitely not a Lebanese restaurant.
I would have known that.
You could do it in an Italian restaurant, but you won’t meet with limited success.
The term is not associated with poker.
Checkmate.
Checkmate.
Checkmate.
Not when I play.
Checkmate, motherfuckers.
Bust.
Kentucky, right?
Yeah.
God help you if you get that Kansas friend.
Knights.
Fuck.
Boba Fett was born on Camino.
Well done.
Yeah.
Good job, Arin.
These words can mean fate or destiny.
Kismet.
Kibbutz.
Kitch.
At least I got the theme song.
That’s hype.
It’s kitschy in here.
Yeah.
I respect it.
Superman Lives was supposed to be released in 1997 by Tim Burton.
Cantos was.
Oh, I know this.
Oh, this was the cage.
No kidding.
Yeah.
I know that.
There’s pictures of the suit that I was going to wear.
It’s insane.
It’s wild.
Euphrates River is in which continent?
That is, isn’t that in Egypt?
Yeah, I think so.
So that would be Africa.
Oh.
Is Egypt in Asia?
No.
Wait, am I wrong?
Hold on.
This is totally in Africa.
Euphrates River?
Euphrates Nuts, dude.
Nice.
Got him.
Euphrates Nuts.
Shut up.
This sucks.
This sucks so bad.
It sucks, but you know, someone out there was like, I laughed.
Yeah.
Yeah, you know what?
It is one of those, like, in the category of Deez Nuts jokes.
It feels pretty good.
There are people that just like them all.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Wow.
Originating in Turkey, the Euphrates River flows through Syria and Iraq.
So it’s basically many countries except Egypt.
Okay.
Dope.
What’s the one in Egypt?
I thought the Tigris and the Euphrates were in Egypt, but it’s been a long time since
I’ve learned these things.
Run of the mill.
Run of the mill.
Which one is the guessing game I’ll have to play by family to do on a show?
I spy.
I spy.
I spy.
Not in the game of Judas.
They’re all just synonyms of I spy.
What is this TV game show that’s mostly based on the game of Hangman?
Oh.
It’s Wheel of Fortune.
I mean, it’s.
Oh, the Nile is the river in Egypt.
It’s not a part of boxing.
Der.
B-wait?
Yeah, B-wait.
I’m coming in at B-wait.
Buzz, buzz, buzz.
Buzz, buzz, buzz.
Flip like a butterfly.
Which of the following are a pair?
Chippendale. Yeah. Wedge and wood? You don’t like Hepple and White?
Hepple and White? Bill and Morris?
Oh, that Hepple. Oh, he’s getting white into trouble.
It’s like a 20’s show that your great grandma would be like, I love that show.
Turn it on the radio, it’s time for Hepple and White.
Salome and Alpine Skiing.
Slalom. Red and Blue. I can’t read.
The colors of the poles.
Dumbo holding his trunk to give him confidence to fly.
A feather. He has dick.
Tales from the Loop is a television series, but what inspired it?
Tales from the Loop? Oh, it was um…
Tales from the Loop?
It’s, it’s, it was a bunch of drawings, wasn’t it?
I don’t know.
Should we use one of our lifelines?
I’m gonna say a role-playing game.
Alright, go for it. We just started, so.
Yeah, fuck it.
Wait, go away.
Yeah, look at you. You know what’s up.
You’re the man.
Uh, Divine Miss M.
Oh, we had this question before. It’s Bette Midler.
That makes sense.
Yeah, she is divine.
Yeah, you bet.
Alright, one American won three titles in track and field.
Oh, dear.
Camelita.
Carmelita.
Carmelita. Sounds delicious on my ice cream.
50-50.
Oh, dear.
I don’t know.
I’m gonna go with Carmel.
Nice.
God damn it. Fucking sucks.
You gotta make it to the million, dog.
Alright, one more time.
Dude, our trivia is terrible.
We’re not great.
Let’s get it. Let’s get that gamer bread.
Ali, if you know any of these, feel free to chime in and save us.
Yeah, just shout it out.
I mean, no pressure.
No pressure.
You can tell us, hey, don’t do that answer.
Now that we know the audience is a bunch of fucking liars.
I can’t believe we waited.
That was the worst one to go out on.
Um, a ball.
You do need a ball.
Shellcock seems like the appropriate answer.
A ball.
Which of these is a North American term for the English called dustbin?
Trash can.
Would you throw this in the rubbish bottle?
What about the waste chest?
Strong smell. Stench.
What the fuck?
The wench on the bench was drenched in stench.
Remember the thing that was called a papoose?
What?
What member of our family is called a papoose?
I thought the papoose was the thing that carries the baby.
Maybe it’s just the baby.
Maybe it’s just the baby.
Popcorn is usually made from which grain?
Corn.
Maize.
Nice.
Do we call it maize?
Dude, you never saw those stories-
I know it’s the ancient name is maize.
You never saw those stories about Native Americans
around the TV eating a big ol’ bowl of popcorn?
Classic.
Which of these plural nouns is the only one
that has a singular noun form?
Uh,
greeting.
Season greetings.
Thank.
Yeah, greeting.
Yeah, you don’t just get one measles.
Thank God.
Type of explosive?
Uh,
Cordite would be my guess.
Okay, sweet.
It sounds like a-
Independent state of Brunei
performs part of which island?
Oh, man.
Let’s ask someone.
I thought we got rid of geography.
Yeah, what the fuck?
Uh, Vanessa.
She says it’s Borneo.
Thank you, Vanessa.
This is so fucking smart, dude.
You’re better than the audience.
Punga.
Damn.
Can’t be Japan.
It sounds New Zealand-y.
Okay.
Good one, Dan.
I’m sweating.
Machu Picchu.
That was the Inca…
That’s…
You said it was so much authority right
until the end.
That was the Inca?
Inca Colas from Peru. Machu Picchu is in Peru.
Smart.
What series is that from the books of the
vanilla saga written by Luke Jennings?
I don’t know.
The series is adapted from the books.
Villanelle?
The Villanelle saga?
Let’s ask. Let’s ask someone.
I want to say 13… I was gonna ask my aunt.
13 reasons why makes the
most sense, but I don’t…
Oh, crap. Oh, fuck.
Yeah. Alright, there we go.
Alright, 43% here. 64.
How many property spaces
can be built upon? 22, baby.
Is that true? Mm-hmm.
We worked it out. That’s right.
Italian Fashion House
started life as a Saturday shop
in Florence in 1906.
Fuck. Great question. What’s a
saddlery shop? Like a
saddle shop? For, like, sandals?
Really? For sandals.
Sandals or saddles? I mean, like a horse.
Damn. All we have is the
50… What is this?
Is it like a reshuffle of the
question? Oh, try it.
Another question? Oh, yes. Oh, awesome.
Which of these Hollywood actresses gave birth to
her second son in the fall of 2008?
Shit, I don’t know.
Does Jillian Anders even have kids?
Okay, 2008. Kirsten Dunst was in Spider-Man
around that time, so probably not her.
Drew Barrymore has two
kids. I want to
say it’s Debra Messing or
Jillian Anderson, but…
Can we
50-50 it too?
Yeah, we can. Alright, let’s just do it. We got nothing
to lose. Oh, damn.
Let’s try Jillian Anderson.
Yeah!
That makes sense. 250 gray!
John Constantine is from
what city?
Oh, man. The
comic guy? I meant to say
250 grand and 250 K
at the same time, and it came out 250
gay, so I just would like to
apologize.
I forgive you. Thank you.
You’re not 100% gay. You’re 250%
gay. That’s…
250,000%
gay.
Who’s John Constantine?
She’s… Keanu Reeves.
Oh, that Constantine?
Yeah.
Okay. It’s a comic book character.
But if that’s the…
So, Blackpool,
Liverpool, and Manchester are all
cities from the UK, right?
From Europe? I think they all are.
Is Lancaster as well?
Well, there is a Lancaster here, but…
That’s why I’m like… Yeah, he’s from
Lancaster, California. I don’t know, man!
I don’t know this shit! Could be Lancaster,
Pennsylvania. Yeah, where the fanciest restaurant
there is Red Lobster. Oh, man.
I think it’s time to take a wild
swing. Oh, man.
I feel like Liverpool.
Because Manchester’s kind of like a…
I don’t know, man.
Fuck.
Blackpool sounds like it makes the most sense
because it’s all gothic and shit.
It’s dark, yeah.
But maybe that’s the trick. Yeah.
I don’t know. I’m trying to trick you.
Close your eyes and push a button. Do you know the answer,
Allie?
They’re all British.
Yeah, I don’t know.
Allie, pick one so we can
blame you for the answer.
Manchester. She says Manchester.
What do you think? You would go against
Allie?
I guess it’s just because I’ve been to
Manchester and it’s like…
It wouldn’t be a very interesting place for a
superhero to be from. How dare you say that? We’ve done
wonderful shows in Manchester.
The Great City of…
I was gonna say Liverpool!
Fuck!
Alright. One more time.
One more run. Let’s do it.
Speed run. Speed run. Here we go.
Speed run the trivia. Last chance.
Okay. We got this.
We got this.
We will be the millionaire. Really could use a
soccer question. Also, by the
way, I’ll just say
last time we played this,
I said that
Bayern Munich,
the team was called Bayern because
it had been bought by Bayer,
the drug company.
I was confusing it with Bayer Leverkusen.
Bayern is actually
German for Bavaria.
I’m glad you cleared that up, man. Well, I’m glad
that I got 8,000 messages
about it, so I got them.
My respect.
I think it’s Pinocchio.
Let it go!
Prime Minister.
Justin Trudeau, sir.
Canadian Donald Trump.
Miss Piggy!
Ms. Puppy.
Miss Caddy.
That’s what they call
me around the office.
Country singer.
Bob Geldof.
He’s from Ireland.
Okay.
He played
Pink in The Wall,
the Pink Floyd movie.
Yeah, he’s good.
He’s got an awful relationship.
Dear John.
Really? Yeah.
I guess that’s not really a term people use anymore,
but I remember it from the 80s.
Who’s John?
I don’t know. How many direct-to-video sequels
to Cinderella have been released?
I think it’s three.
Three sounds right.
Well, no, because if it’s the first one…
Because I think there’s three Cinderella’s,
so that means there’s two sequels.
I agree, so it’s B.
Nicely worked out, guys.
This sport was the
Bosman…
This is all you, Dan.
I’ve never heard of this.
Bosman?
I don’t know.
I would guess
either boxing or tennis.
Oh, a wall of football.
Football it is. What the hell is the
Bosman ruling?
We made it to 250,000.
One more. That was too short.
Oh, shit. Alright.
Dance in charge. We’re just here.
We gotta make a run at it, at least.
Whatever you want.
I got nothing going on, so I’m on your guys’ side today.
Fucking
King Avedan over here.
Oh.
What?
They meant soccer football.
Ah.
Futhbol.
The Bosman ruling.
You should know that. You love soccer football.
I do love soccer football, but I don’t know
the story of it. It’s by the character of the Flash.
Uh, Hermes. Yeah.
Hermes is fast.
Informal term in a
casino slot machine.
What the fuck?
Informal term. One-armed bandit.
Wow, that’s funny.
I’ve never heard that. It made the most sense, right?
Yeah. That was
Russia.
Rusia.
Ruska.
A chancel. Chancel is a feature
of what kind of building? Fucking, what the hell
is this shit? Is this like the first three questions?
Chances.
Church.
Wow, Arin. Because I figure it’s
a chancelor. Flora and fauna
is the Latin term meaning of what?
Plants and animals. Yeah.
I learned that from
Metal Gear Solid.
Cool.
The flora and fauna out there. Eat it, school. Call me if you have
any questions.
Which of these games uses a board with rooms and a house
marked on it?
Clue?
Nice. Yeah, the
questions, it’s like, yeah, you’re like, wait.
The phrase fat Freddy’s
frog is an example of what?
That’s alliteration, baby. Alliteration.
Is it the paradox
because frogs, uh,
Freddy’s frog is not fat?
Alfredo Linguini’s part of the issue. I’m gonna say that’s probably
cars. Oh, damn.
There’s someone probably named
Linguini in the second,
one of the Italian cars.
Paper money. I don’t know, but I’m interested
to find out.
I want to say China.
Really? Wait.
Because I, you know,
it’s the fucking,
uh,
fuck.
The, what the, the, the
Phoenicians.
Do you remember in Epcot when you go on the thing
and he’s like pounding the papyrus
and he’s like,
and they’re like, thank the Phoenicians,
they invented it. You know what I
mean? But it’s not even on here, so.
Where the Phoenicians are from. I know, exactly.
Uh. We should probably use
the lifeline. Oh, man.
Which one? We’re eight questions in, it’s not too bad.
What’s the, the answer lifeline?
Oh, for fuck’s sake, China.
Yeah, good job. You were right, you were right.
Which of these is a
seabird? A snipe, right?
I don’t know. No.
Swallow is not a seabird.
No, it’s not.
Scua is funny.
A snipe.
A snipe is like a,
it’s like a, it’s like a swamp
bird, isn’t it? I don’t know, he’s from
Ravenclaw. I mean, uh,
Slytherin.
Snipe. Is ever a snipe?
Um.
That is how you say it in a British accent.
Ah, yes, it’s ever a snipe.
Oh, the swamp bird, the
snipe.
Scua sounds funny. That just sounds
like the sea. It’s, it’s, yeah,
it’s like Barracuda, scua, like it feels
like it should be underwater.
Scuba.
What do you say?
Scua?
Snipe?
I don’t know. Yeah, I don’t know.
Alley pick for us.
Snipe or scua for a seabird?
Scua.
Yeah boy!
Alley is just throwing up the peace sign.
Hell yeah.
Alright.
Which Star Wars movie did John Williams not
compose the original soundtrack?
Um, assuming that would be
Rogue One. Or Solo.
Ooh, definitely
Revenge of the Sith and Rise of Skywalker.
Can we get rid of two?
Yeah. It’s
probably gonna get rid of
it. Son of a bitch.
It’s every time!
They know which ones you know.
Fuck.
They can read this, the desire sensor.
I know, right?
This is tough.
I would have thought John Williams
would have composed everything Star Wars related at this
point, but he definitely has had like Ghost
or not Ghost Riders, but like spiritual people take over
for him. I don’t want to say Rogue One.
Cause I don’t remember any
of the music.
Cause I don’t remember any of the music.
Nicely done, Arin.
He did Solo, interesting.
First name of the gamekeeper Malores
and Lady Chatterley’s lover.
Oh boy.
What?
If I had to guess, I would say Duncan, but I don’t know.
Fuck!
Oliver Malores.
Everyone knows that.
How could we have forgotten?
Duncan Malores just sounded
It sounded appropriate.
It had some nice Chatterley flow to it.
Yes.
Well guys, I’m sorry we didn’t make it to be a millionaire.
Nothing new for us, brother.
You’re just going to have to pay us the million now.
We’re going to have to get the entire office in here.
How close have you guys gotten?
I think that was the closest we’ve ever gotten.
That $250,000
was about as close as we’ve gotten.
Dang. Microids.
Elliot Graciano handles the coup.
The coup.
Well guys, thanks for having me.
Dude, this was delightful.
It was a lot of fun.
I’ve also realized I’m really bad at trivia.
It’s humbling, isn’t it?
It’s very humbling.
You can’t carry that much information.
The two things you like.
For me, it’s Magic the Gathering and
Jerking Off.
Strangely enough, they didn’t make
either one of those categories.
Jerking Off is the one I’m very surprised
was even considered to be put on the board.
Exactly. Mega Man.
If they had a Mega Man one, I could do it.
I would love it if your four
chosen categories were Arts and Literature,
Mega Man, Jerking Off,
and Magic the Gathering.
Whether you only get Arts and Literature
questions and know the other three.
In Lady Chatterley’s Lover.
Alright, we’ll see you later everybody.
Bye. Love you. Kisses and hugs.
Feel it.
Feel it through the headphones.
Be safe with it. Feel it through your phone.
Hugs and kisses.
You have like a hammerhead shark.
I gave him a little tail.
I was like…
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